I can crit this one more if you want crit (I went really light and super easy because I'm not sure XD), or you could look into the Writer's Block group if you really want to get better. But I won't spoil your fun if you just want to write :)
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RE: The Wizards betrayal – A Concept Fantasy Story - Part One
I'm not sure yet to be honest.. kind of just trying to see if I can write an interesting story I guess; perhaps let me play a bit and I'll yell out for some more crit :)