6 Life-changing Lessons you can only learn after Heartbreak

in #writing7 years ago

Falling in love is one of the best things that could ever happen in our lives. It is inevitable, heart-stopping, and a life changer for some. It is like jumping from the highest mountain without thinking how you’ll end up down there.

Love doesn’t appear with any warning signs, and yet we are brave enough to take risks, to get hurt. And with rainbows and butterflies along the way, there will also be storm and sorrow.

To love someone is as easy as counting 1, 2, and 3, but to accept the fact that you’ll have to deal with pain is a different story. Our heartbreaks can teach us the most important lessons in life and here are some:

  1. Love is not always the right answer.

Just because we love a person, doesn’t mean it is right and worth it to stay. Just because we love a person doesn’t mean the relationship deserves a second chance. Sometimes, it just doesn’t work that way. We have to accept the fact that love is not a magic word to save a relationship. Love doesn’t always conquer.

  1. Never be sorry for who you are.

Don’t be sorry for things that do not need an apology. Don’t be sorry for the days that you are insecure. Don’t be sorry for caring too much. Don’t be sorry for standing up for what you believe in. Most importantly, never be sorry for being the person you are. Remember that there’s always a person who will accept you and who will stay with you, no matter how messed up you are.

  1. Never lose yourself because of love.Becoming one is very romantic and feels good in the beginning of the relationship. However, this often leads to isolation and inauthenticity. Losing yourself will eventually become a barrier to form a true and healthy relationship. He fell in love with you because you are YOU. Love does not come with standards: it shall not manipulate you to become another person’s ideal partner.

  2. Love yourself, too.

Loving someone makes us forget about ourselves, and sometimes, giving your all is still not enough to make a relationship last—still not enough to make them stay. There’s nothing wrong with being deeply in love. We all know it. But NEVER abandon your self-worth. Don’t treat yourself like you are last in line. You also need to realize that you deserve the kind of love that isn’t selfish and is pure.

  1. It’s okay to say “no.”

Don’t hesitate to disagree and learn to respect each other’s differences. Don’t wait until you hit your breaking point, because of continuously pushing yourself to accept the things you don’t like. You deserve to be understood, to be respected, and to be valued by your partner. Learn to say ”No” and explain yourself in a way that you’ll both comprehend. Communicate and always meet halfway.

  1. You can be genuinely happy on your own.

While most of us may find romantic relationships fulfilling, having someone is not necessary to lead a happy life. In fact, others are much happier living on their own.

Your life is completely fine before you met this guy, so believe in yourself that you’ll eventually get back on track, and when that time comes, you will realize that happiness can’t be found in other people. It’s within you.


Love is such a beautiful thing. It’s the feeling from within that completes us, but also can break the hell out of our hearts. But despite of all the pain, your heartbreak reveals who you truly are; it reminds you that you’re a person of strength, that you are still the brave one.
Your heartbreaks made you wiser, stronger, and a better version of yourself. You are done with the agony, you are done with the lonely nights. It is now the reflection of everything you have endured.

One day, you’ll be grateful on how these heartbreaks helped you reinvent yourself.