It's always nice to see new aspiring authors come onto the platform. Your chapter has merit and I certainly like the idea of traveling into book worlds, but you might consider formatting your post a bit differently. It appears as a wall of text, which can be a bit daunting. Consider leaving blank lines to more clearly divide it into paragraphs.
Best of luck, and looking forward to your next instalment.
Tiny
That is some great advise and thank you for your kind words. I will edit it right now :) feel free to give me any other creative critique. i love to improve my writing. :)
Well. There is a discord server full of writers dedicated to helping each other. ;-) Some of my posts refer to that magical place.
that sounds awesome :) could you post me a link to it here, i'm not sure in which of your posts it is. thank you
I'm on my phone so it's a bit awkward. But I believe the one on writing in a second language has a link at the bottom. ;-)
awesome, i found it. thank you very much for the link. Also thank you for the editing advise. i split it into three text segments and also made a "change line" in the middle of the second. Looks a lot better already :)