Yoga literally rewires the system, so give yourself a break while you're doing the heavy work @blacklux!
Through a crazy amount of indoctrination, modern humans are seriously disconnected from their bodies. For just one tiny example, children aren't trusted to regulate their own body temperatures--parents tell them they "have to" put on a coat to go outside or whatever. This and thousands and millions of tiny little incidents throughout our lives teach us to listen to some external authority over our own bodies and our own innate intuition. We integrate that stuff into our subconscious, and electrical signals get misdirected in the system.
You're basically programmed to be out of touch with your body, and you literally do not have the neural connections to masterfully command it--yet. With practice, yoga can make you aware of countless parts of yourself, and you really do regrow parts of the brain and nerves to connect it to muscle tissue throughout the body. It may take time and patience, but the body learns how to do things it didn't know how to do before!
I suggest you go easy on yourself and trust the process that more control is coming. I'm really glad to hear you're going to give it another try! I know from experience that it can be frustrating at first, especially when it feels so foreign, but judgment on yourself or expecting it to look or feel a certain way adds a heavy mental and physical burden...I could get into the science of that too, it's all so fascinating!
Your words motivate me to keep trying! Thanks!
Go, @blacklux, go!!! You can do it, you can do it, you can do it, you can do it!!!!!!!!!
I can do it, i caaan!!! You're good at motivating!!
:D