Advice for the future?
The way is in training. You might not like it, someone may've put you off the taste, but freedom is discipline. There are as many sayings as there are people around this idea, but it's that momentum that's built off action. So to enter a state of flow, where you accomplish what you envision with great facility, you must do. Do it daily. Deliberately. There might even be a moment your eyebrows lift up, your head tilts, and the same scene has a different perspective.
Experiences are felt, but hard to explain. Share them. Your story might move another if only you tell it.
A couple things I didn't appreciate it til' now.
Great advice. Your comment reminds me a lot of Stoicism. The Stoic philosophy preaches the importance of making it a habit to become stronger, better, tougher, more temperate each day. I signed up for these emails a few months ago and they've helped me tremendously: https://dailystoic.com/dailyemail
I too believe in the value of sharing experiences. I could cause a spark in someone that ignites real and lasting change.