What I take from the post. You need someone to talk to. Talking to dad about things is not the same. Cause he is dad.
I'm not sure why it works this way be it just does it seem.
My DM is open to you to talk about anything, Or just for someone to shout at if needed.
I appreciate it, though I feel like it's also something I just.. don't do really. Cause I don't want to seem like I'm just dumping everything on people like crazy.
I also don't want to feel like I'm just dumping everything on people..
Even though I KNOW talking helps a lot.. it's like this post helps because I've effectively talking to myself.
Oddly enough I feel like talking to someone who's JOB is to talk about these things isn't the best. I guess it depends on the person cause I have distinct memories of talking to people and feeling like they aren't genuinely interesting in what I'm saying.
Donno why that works that way either really. Perpetually feeling like a massive burden even if the very same people you are 'burdening' say you are not.
But still I do appreciate the offer.
Well I can tell you, I feel a burden when I listen to people.
It is hard to listen to the troubles of others. Especially because there is very little can be done to help.
The burden to me when I listen, IS not to talk too much, To stay silent and listen. Then I have all these things going around in my head that I have to filter through and try ignore the emotion.
But it does not hurt me. It can take me down for a while. the not being able to help. But my whole life as been a struggle to find another that can understand me. In the journey I found ways to understand those who cannot understand me.
The door is always open.
I can actually very much relate to this. Listening feel quite easy on paper perhaps this is why I always feel like a burden to people even if they claim I'm not?
Because I know already that listening to this stuff IS a burden no matter what.
I will say, even these conversations on chain are greatly helpful. It has this kind of grounding effect that just gets your head in the right frame of mind to tackle a few issues or maybe make a little bit of progress.
I'm actually in the process of making yet more lists. sticky notes on my desktop that help me keep track of things and thoughts. I'm going to track all the things I do for the day so I can actually acknowledge that I've been productive and accomplished something.. even if it's getting the washing done lol.
That and also defining some bite sized goals helps a ton it seems.
Let me put it bluntly to you.
I am here for you to burden.
I do need to shoot out for about 30 minutes though.
It is only by taking the burden I can be there for you.
I have taken heavier loads than you carry.
I am 56 probably about the same age as Dad.