How does your faith or religion comfort you? Does it help you see the truth? Does it give you guidance in times of hardship? What are the consequences to breaking a rule in your faith? Are the rules tools to bring better self-awareness? Or are the rules of your faith just rules which you are supposed to follow because someone says you should?
I really don't like the word "should." To me most shoulds are unsupported (self?) righteousness. Explain to me WHY you think the way you do. Give me REASON, and then I'll share with you my ways and reasons...then we can have a dialogue. ✌🏾THEN maybe we can learn something from each other. Don't just "should" all over me supporting such shoulds with, "because some leader or some book told me so."
Sorry for my ranting, but today was just… weird. I had a lunch with a sweet friend. It's never been really a close friendship between us, because she is friendly and helpful, but delusional. For eight years I've heard her do nothing but complain and moan, often in front of her daughters, about her husband, their father. She has been unhappy, discontent, resentful, ungrateful, etc. I don't see it as my place to tell her how I see her. I just try and listen, maintain neutral face, and shuttle her out of my kitchen as soon as possible.
Well today she lets me know that her marriage is heading towards divorce. I am sad for her stress and how traumatic this must be to her normal and for her daughters, but there's no hope of happiness in their present situation. I cannot help but be glad for whatever is to come next because their status quo is misery for everyone.
Oh, and I learned that part of the big drama is that my friend found out her husband has been secretly masturbating for 20 years! Using PORN!!! 😱
I told her I love porn and that I have no problem with masturbation, only with the fact that he hid all of that from her. She is still a little irate over this "indiscretion." She has no desire for him. She stayed with him for 20 years because you're supposed to when you take that vow in marriage, "for the children", and because he paid her bills for the last 20 years. I guarantee you she was never very open to his sexual advances. He's human, he has needs… What else was he supposed to do? What the hell has SHE been doing for her own sexual wellness if she wasn't sleeping with him and she wasn't masturbating… ? 🤔
Orgasm, in my opinion, is required for mental and physical well-being. At least it is for me...daily practice is best for me. Our bodies are like airplanes or automobiles. If they sit long unused they break down and shit festers.
My friend's religion preaches that masturbation is wrong in all situations. So she is claiming that he had an affair against her, with himself.
Jesus 'Effing Christ 🙄
Thank you for reading. I just needed to vent and get all of that off craziness off of my chest and out of my head.
Sounds to me that he was specifically NOT cheating. What else was the poor man supposed to do??
Did she say that?
Next time...
1 - What marriage vows? Ask her to recite them to you.
Unless they aren't the usual vows the first thing you'll notice is that...
...there is no mention of children at all.
There is however a whole lot about being there for each other, which from the sounds of things vows she's long since abandoned .
https://www.theknot.com/content/traditional-wedding-vows-from-various-religions
In religious terms you aren't even married in such a case and can ask for an annulment. Even in Islamic law you can get a divorce in such a case. If she thinks she can take some high moral ground she's very mistaken. It's much worse than that she's picking and choosing which vow she thinks is important, there is no marriage vow that talks about children at all! And even if there was, it would need to be a vow whichdirectly contradicted everything that these marriage vows consider important. See if we're talking about what's best for the children, no one would ever think staying married in a toxic relationship is still good for the children. Maybe that's why no vows actually say anything like that.
2 - So now we've established by her own logic she's not kept her vows, and therefore in the eyes of all these major regions effectively not even married what right moral, religious or intellectual does she imagine she has over her husbands bodily autonomy?
Seriously, what possible argument could anyone come up with which doesn't immediately debunk itself?
If she wants to make an argument from marriage she's already proven herself bankrupt. Marriage as a civil contract in law just requires a signature, but "under god" it matters what you DO - that's what the vows are FOR.
Someone doesn't get to claim to take their marriage vows seriously if they're not actually following any of them.
Sorry for laughing out loud... the subject may not be funny, but kind of absurd(?), and the way you present it makes it funny to me... great faces too!
I remember, when I lived in the States, people often went like.. "oh you again", and "you Germans are the kinkiest people in the world".. even when I thought, i didn't say anything "outrageous" 😇😜
Really shouldn't laugh, because its actually pretty sad, when someone is locked up in this kind of thinking. Plus, I remember a time, when I had a "friend" with an big influence on my thinking a long time ago. He talked me into a kind of religious delusion and for a while I felt like some higher (police-)being was recording my every thought and move... horrible time, thank god I could get over it...
But sometimes I still imagine "hell" like a super giant movie theater and once you leave this earthly existence, every soul that ever lived goes there, to see your whole life, in all embarrassing detail and every thought you ever had.. yaaaakk 😱
Nice :), thanks for posting!
great article
Sometimes I just don't understand these religious rules barmy. Its like there designed to suppress people so much the go out and do things they are not supposed to on a huge excessive scale!
Its perfectly normal to masturbate male or female !
Sex is communication and masturbation is regulation.... sounds like a rap :-D
Thanks for sharing - nice post and so true.
A tribute to @ramengirl
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I don't think there is anything wrong in Orgasm. God made us in that way, so what the hell wrong in expressing that.
I agree with this thought @steemed-open
You are free to express what is in your own body. That is the self-pleasures that others can not guarantee.
"My" body or vehicle in this realm is my business and what "I" choose to do with it or how to use it in my reality is my concern alone. If my partner wishes to partake so be it if not her loss. No one including religious figures, especially not them will tell me what's acceptable or not. Ha! She seems childish in many ways. He's better off without her and is a much better man than I for stickin' around so long. I reread my statements after reflecting a moment and thought they were a bit harsh as I don't know these people but this was my reaction and feelings just after reading your post.......... I let it go after almost deleting it but there's always a flip side to the coin and I wonder what the rest of the story is? I do know that misery loves company................... enjoyed.
In agreement with your opinion on orgasm.. Hehe. Two thumbs up.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us! Good hand job :)
Wait, what? He had an affair with online porn? LOL Well, let's lay out this scenario in her ways of thinking. I know you'll recall the post you made where I commented on your ass. Well, I guess in her mind, I was having an affair with your ass? Maybe not affair, but i had rounded 3rd base and headed for home really fast. Heaven forbid that poor guy ever let her catch him in Hooters.
Unfortunatelyall too typical here in the bible belt. 80% of the people I work with are of that persuasion and the men I work with would be in deep shit if their wives caught them watching porn.
If she's withholding he needs a release. Poor guy. My wife watches more porn than I do and I love it 😂
after watching she would give you best one ahan :) thats why you loved that :D
Sounds like a prude, whiny bitch. Guys finally going to be free of that.
Orgasm part is good, I hope heaven is like that.
masterbation is wrong in many religion because hands are not made to be fucked i am a man i do masterbate too well i think we all are needy for ass arent we ? early marriages are good solution to these but wtf they were doing in those 20 years she should have tried to got sexuall attention from her husband she should not let him do masterbate i cant even imagine having wife a man willl master bate :P damn craziest story ! :P
What a shame, and what a waste for both of them. Pleasure is rare enough in this short life. If there's a way we can share it, increase it, or even enjoy it for ourselves (without harming anyone else) isn't it our obligation to partake?
This sentence had me scratching my head for a minute. I pictured an airplane dropping a package on the ground and someone in the hangar saying, "Gross. Look at those festers." But I kind of like the image.
Take care of yourself and shit poops, not festers. That's my motto for today.