I don't care if I didn't win, I got the enjoyment of reading some of those comments. 10/10 will upvote!
Also
i follw u n pvte nw u fllw me
equates to
I follow you and upvote, now you follow me.
Just, shittier
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I thought you were asking me to do teh privates sexy on teh skype.
Oh god no. I promise I was not trying to get that, I am sorry if this closes some doors for you but I don't uh, I don't think you are my type