Only today I realized that this year I had two breakups. Before the New year I especially want to let go of the unnecessary and clean up.
How to clean our emotions? To speak out, to describe it in a personal diary, to make some symbolic action that will confirm to us that these emotions we have experienced and let go.
And, of course, to thank life, God, people, ourselves for all this we have received as a valuable experience.
So, I decided to talk it out here and thus help myself to survive and complete what has already been completed.
This year, finally, ended my very strange relationship with a guy with whom we then converged, then parted three years in a row.
It was the person whom I very much loved and didn't want to release, three times came back to him. I especially liked him because he had similar spiritual aspirations, I liked how smart and competent he was in his field, and I liked his looks.
He is a good person, positive and I think we were good for each other. But something was in his attitude towards me, which from the very beginning said that the family will not work out of this. You know, there are people who are not ready to build a family, no matter how old they are. Now, he was one of those people.
We parted, but still there were hope. I thought I was perfectly calm about it, and I thought I was free. We continued to correspond sometimes, as friends. But I was very worried when he said he was starting a new relationship with another girl. I was in a lot of pain and all I thought about for a week was this. It seemed to me that it's not supposed to hurt me, but I was very worried.
Fortunately, the experience soon ended. And another story began. In my life just at this moment there was another person who I liked. We communicated every day, confidentially and emotionally. We learned a lot of good things about each other and something not very pleasant.
Then we started dating. But it was difficult because we live in different cities. I was very attracted to this person, he is a smart and interesting man, I really liked our communication and mutual sincerity and attentiveness. But even before we first wrote to each other on social media, it was clear to me that we had no common future. Gradually our relationship ended and we parted.
And what I want to say: I, the person who is ready to overcome the short-term desires for the sake of the long-term purposes, for some reason twice entered into the doubtful relations, initially knowing that they will end.
But most of us want our love to last a lifetime, to be close to a loved one who is reliable and who will stay with us even in the most difficult times. To be near our family, which accepts us, knowing about our shortcomings. That there were those people who will support in trouble and will share our pleasure.
But the modern Western world rather destroys family values than supports them. And sometimes I'm surprised to find myself making decisions that don't fit my true inner urges.
So, now, at the end of the year, I summarize and thank life for all the experience that I have gained! I thank these two men I broke up with for being in my life. I wish them happiness!
And I also want to listen more to my real aspirations, to hear myself better. I only want to go where I really choose to go. And with those people with whom we have common values and goals.
Thank you for listening to me, I'm relieved. Do you have something in your life that you would like to be cleansed of?
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Start again and again :)
#ZAP
yeah, but I think maybe it's time to stop)))
i think that too some day a random relationship will become
#ZAP
I gave you a reply in a vlog. Hope you'll Like it.
I'll be appreciated if you resteem this.
https://steemit.com/dtube/@arslan786/j98sy9ti
Greetings, my dear Behelen
I understand your pain in those hours. I guess it's not good to see. A term (mourning) is always bad. Even if we try to hide this by showing others that we are well, on the inside, we really know how our emotions are.
You are beautiful, my dear, and I imagine that a new and beautiful love for you will not be lacking.
Thank you and good evening!
@julisavio, thank you for your support and kind words! I believe in the best.
First of all big clap for you girl, because you had gone through so many and you are strong and overcome them.. yes, i have also something which i buried inside me from few years ago , few months ago. All i can tell you due to social media currently i don't understand people's mentality. I also have gone through so much , pain and heartbroken but i gave myself a fresh start and locked all pain inside and decided to keep myself happy... thank you for this amazing post...
#zapp
Thank you for your response, @priyanarc!
I hope you'll be happy! When we decide to be happy, nothing will prevent us from being happy.
yes, you are right.. It's our life and only we can design it of our own choice...thank you for your kind words and response...
Wow, this is very hard to hear.
I am very sorry for what happened to you this year, I know that when a person you love leaves, there is a huge gap because that person promised to love you forever, so it hurts more.
But something that can help you is to take some time to recover, so that you will be strong again.
I hope you have a good day.
Thank you, @fabian98! Yes, I give myself time to calm down and I know, it'll go away someday.
:)
This is a very rough patch in everybody's life. But i love your approach to the whole situation, you are a very elegant warrior.
But then again I would be listening to "arriana grande's thank you next" if i was in your place LOL
thank you for sharing this!
#zap
Haha))! Thanks!
"Thank you, next!
I'm so fuckin' grateful for my ex!"
Don't feel so bad I haven't had any relationship in over three years. Western media has made a paradigm shift in humanity. Humanity went from a society that took care, rewashed, reused everything they had. They worked together on their farms or businesses. Then the television came out (tele-vision' story- vision, tel- lie-vision) Slowly started showing empowerment through throwing things away. For example, everything started to become disposable. Plates, knives, storage containers, houses, YOU NAME IT. POOF, TV shows, "you don't need him", "you are better off alone"... etc etc. They Push empowerment through separation. Western culture separates everything, takes the good of it out and prepackages it in a way that people either buy, or fall for. After 5 generations of this, people are bred to not care. ITS A #@$#! up thing. Everything id disposable today. Even LOVE. Its sad. Money didn't use to buy happiness but today it does because it gives you piece of mind. The world governments want this constant fear in the back of peoples minds. They don't want people "owning" property, they want you to fiancee, I hate to break it to people, Unless you pay off that house, YOUR JUST RENTING. So hard to explain properly what it is i mean to convey but your a smart girl! I think you'll kinda understand! What a great video. Its sad to hear they didn't work out but that just means there's something better meant for you! #ZAP+
Yes, now the media, politics in developed countries promotes all disposable. And the same we can see in the relationships of people.
Thank you for your kind words, @prettynicevideo! I also think that if everything turned out this way, then life is preparing for me something better in the future).
Well thanks for sharing. Nothing wrong with what you have time. Life is tough. Often it is hard to make a final decision on many things. As mentioned in other comments. The lifestyle of today makes relationships very hard. Often can be hard to meet others when schedules are indifferent. In all the challenges. Consider this. It is not your fault. You did everything right. You are strong and kind. As usual resteemed and upvoted as well. Look forward to your next video of your great wisdom.
Thank you, @worldtraveller32!
No one is to blame, and both are responsible.
I don't think the West is to blame to be honest. So for example there are countries that do not have divorce but yet the husband can legally kill his wife if he gets sick of her. As if she is property like an old shoe, or a broken down car to be gotten rid of like trash. Not to mention they can legally beat their wife, as well as rape.
I think the real problem is mostly men who are selfish. These particular type of men want to use the woman for sex, as a slave to cook, and do laundry. These men are unfaithful and cheat on their wife as soon as the "butterflies" fly away.. so just because they can not legally divorce does not mean that they are living in a paradise either. They also throw acid on their wives and cut their noses and ears off in the East.
I have never heard of a husband doing that in the West.
At the end of the day if two people are going to spend their life together and spend it loving one another than they both need to have that common goal from the very beginning. Also girls who give sex away immediately give the man what he wants to fast and then the man gets sick of the girl and thinks "hmm what do I need to marry her for? I get it all for free anyhow".
The problem is most men 'say' they want that a family just to get sex. And or say upfront that they 'do not want a family' and then expect to have sex (which as we all know makes babies). So they want sex but not the product of the sex (the human infant). And then the woman is left to be told 'get rid of it'? So she has to murder her own baby all because a guy wanted 5 minutes of fun? Oh hell no!
The point being and the problem is this.. most men just want sex. And they may not admit it but it is true. And even if they claim to be in love usually it is just butterflies/hormones.. that fade and wear off.
Violence against women, abuse both mental and physical, and abandonment of both women and children goes back thousands of years and did not start in the West. I think the cold hard truth is most men are selfish and only care about their 6 inches of skin and how it feels for 5 minutes.. than the "human woman" that they are with's feelings.
I am single and I will never marry a man. He would have to be worthy of giving the rest of my life to and frankly I have never met anyone worthy of that.
I am very happy living life to the fullest. I don't need a man to find joy. In fact since being single I have never been happier. I have peace and peace of mind. I am no ones slave. I do as I please. I have no boss but me.
Great video sweetie!
xoxo <3
#girlpower
Thanks for the comment, @kawaiicrush!
I don't think Western thinking is to blame. It makes a big contribution, and I only mentioned it because I live in Western culture and watch it around me.
Earlier, before I was 6 years old, I lived in the USSR, and I remember that then the attitude to marriage was quite different. Although there, too, were their problems. No physical abuse of women, but since the divorce was censured, people often endured each other for years.
That, what you describe at the end (you're single and that you are completely satisfied), I some days feel the same.
In the past, I always had a goal to be with someone in a couple, but now I realize with mixed feelings that maybe I don't need it. I don't know if it's temporary depression or my real desire - let's see.
@behelen, I hope next year will be much more successful. Wish you a good luck!
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Thank you, @cryptospa!
Like the saying 'No love lost, no love found'. At a point in every relationship, we all have this moment of clarity which shows us the direction the relationship is going and its up to us to either hold on to a dying flame or let go of a dead weight to find another that will stand the test of time. Never be scared of new beginings cos it might be exactly what we need. Compliment of the season.
Thank you, @folawe! I also think so. Something is over, to start something new.