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RE: A Day in the Clouds (Chapter 9) - The Hours Between 1300 and 1400

in #fiction8 years ago

"The sound of their scratching and squeaking echoed throughout the stronghold. It was only a matter of time until they compromised its structural integrity. The four walls wept at its impending destruction."
Oh this section really pulled me in. What a scene of suspense you create bro, well done.

" "Let’s talk," I commanded to them. “I come in peace. Those giants — your enemy — is my enemy. Let us work together and—”

They interrupted me with undecipherable chattering. The creatures didn’t seem to understand my call for peace, and I didn’t know how to act it out for them."

This saddens me because I can only imagine the frustration Zepp feels from always being misunderstood and not being able to communicate with others fluidly without stress, worry or unintentional friction.

"I waved my hands to the side, pushing myself against the clouds. Once my body was perpendicular to the ground, I steadied my breathing and cleared my mind. I clenched my fist, as I built up enough speed to rocket through the growing number of opponents gathered. This was all very exhilarating!"

You can say that again! When he started to fly with the wind, I was instantly in the action scenes of a great movie.

""That’s how you do it," I whispered to the wind."

Another favorite characteristic is how he whispers often, especially when he mutters under his breath "traitor" at Tetan.

Overall wonderful chapter, after reading the comments, I wasn't sure what this chapter was revealing other than a dream state or his imagination as if he was playing but the latter is highly unlikely because Ledd doesn't ever seem to lose focus on trying to escape and I didn't think he was recounting his plans of escape in his head, so my initial thought of dreaming was more spot on since he is still recovering from his sickness. Wonderfully written bro

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Spot on!! I wanted to tell a fever dream sequence where he's in the giants' shoes. We (the giants) don't understand the way he communicates, much like how he doesn't understand the undecipherable chatter of his new opponents. I didn't want to say it outright, but I tried to convey it by noting that he has grown relative to his environment. He's a giant now, and that is a real nightmare scenario for him haha!