My father was a very generous man who’d literally give you his last shilling. However, in the interests of as he put it ‘separating the needy from the greedy’ he would sometimes accept a favour in return. Ofttimes this was a poem or a sketch, as most of his drinking buddies were artists and dreamers, but on this one occasion he was owed by a guy called Ructions who was reputed to be a painter, not the easel kind the handyman kind, so Ructions was commissioned to paint the exterior of our house.
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Following much ado about nothing and a few false starts involving ladders, the painting proceeded until one side of the house was a glorious grey and the paint ran out. My father, ever extravagant, had bought the best quality paint for our slum dwelling but Ructions, dispatched to the paint shop and thinking no one would notice, bought a cheaper paint, an entirely different shade of grey, pocketing the excess cash.
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Thus it came to pass that we had the only two-tone house in the street, the source of much merriment for the neighbours, especially when the same Ructions knocked down our gate posts with his van when backing out of the drive. You couldn’t make it up!
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And no, that certainly wasn’t the last time a not so handy man came to call.
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Posted as part of the 5 minute freewrite challenge Day 102, by @mariannewest which you can see here:
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-102-5-minute-freewrite-monday-prompt-paint
Images: pixabay
Lol darn those handyman's that are not so handy. Photos are fitting. :-)
A handyman called Ructions. The name says it all. Thanks for reading.
Lol yeah true, and you're very welcome. :-)
That was a very entertaining read! Gave me a real chuckle. :D Lord, do I know some Ructionses... ;)
Yeah, well don't give them any painting jobs, will ya.
Unfortunately, I kind of have. And now my balcony is kind of a different color... :P But you'll be surprised how often you see this type of craftsmanship around here. There are many buildings in Sofia that literally look like patchwork.
Ructions Doyle was his name handyman was his game. I remember him well and that very job.
Isn't the name Ructions enough to make him suspicious. Haha
That should teach him a lesson. Lovely as usual
We sorta hoped he wouldn't live up to his name.
I still don't get how you can write something beautiful within 5 minutes. Do you have any full published work? I've been silently reading your works. Decided to leave a comment. Amazing work
G'way will ya! Flattery 'ill get ya nowhere;)
This Ructions fella bears my second name but I assure you he is no relation. Although I am partial to several shades of grey.
Hahaha, you're a positive riot! I won't be askin' you to paint me walls!
Very very good
Cheers, thanks.
You welcome
Ructions!! :) :) brilliant. A thoroughly enjoyable freewrite @deirdyweirdy
Cheers, thanks a lot. I really liked your bridge freewrite.
I know lots of people like that! Don't want them to help me! 😛
It's sometimes worth it just for the laughs! Thanks for reading.
Haha real life really is often times stranger than fiction. I do believe you that one can't make that stuff up. At least you got an awesome story out of it!
Cheers, thanks. It sometimes feels as if life's been one long pantomime.
Feels? I feel like it truly is!
The house had an original color, then it stayed in that tonality? Nice post!
The house was white and ended up one half dark grey and the other light grey.
Thanks for reading.
Aw. The dads a sweetheart.
There was no wife in the story, but I could just picture her in the background wearing an apron and cleaning her hands on it. Constantly shaking her head.
You'd more likely find her around the back of the pram sheds guzzling from a whiskey bottle;)
Woow amazing beautiful l like, very good