This seems to me to be a deep psychological post. Measuring the quantity of connection with other people is a thing that everyone does at times. This measurement you put forward is indeed similar in most cases. When we interact with other people a sense of understanding has to emerge inorder to feel comfortable.
Everybody is different. Finding right people who can give us right joy is a difficult thing and it requires luck in many cases. It's good to know that you have found a girlfriend with whom you can talk comfortably. I think I can comfortably talk to you if we meet! All the best @ned