Friendship could hurt so badly when messed up just within a few days. It makes you question "what happened? How come? What went wrong? Could I be at fault? Should I have said sorry?"
Most times, some broken friendships would not bring answers because you never know what went down the radar. It could be devastating and worrisome, you know?
My friend has been heartbroken for a long time now and she just opened up to me two weeks ago of what she has been passing through. She is in a deep sense of sadness and disappointment because of the lost friendship she valued and cherished.
The truth is that I feel for her more. I understand how saddening it could be to lose years of friendship and do not know why it happened. She has done her part to find the reason, she needed a quick solution to bring back the dead friendship but it seems like the more she seeks answers to why it happened, the more tightened the situation becomes as the other lady is not ready to open up.
Do people value real relationships or friendships? Will they allow something to destroy what they have built for years?
My friend is feeling lonely and thinking about their relationship. She went down memory lane on how they helped each other, walked together, played, planned her wedding together, laughed, cried, and supported each other and this lady does not mind letting this wash away.
Losing friendship is the worst thing that could happen to some people especially when they so much cherish such a bond with each other. Letting go of the sweet memories, how you have helped each other grow, and because of a trivial issue that could have been resolved amicably, you decided it's over. How do you feel about deciding that?
It's always hard on the other person who does not want it to end because of this kind of a person who do not understand the true meaning of love. When she was explaining how it happened some years ago which she is just opening up to me now, I couldn't stop pitying her because I know how the friendship had started even before meeting her. My friendship with her is over 16 years and she has been friends with this lady before meeting me. They both went to the same secondary school and till they got married three years ago, things have gone worse between them.
I do not like it when people choose to end a relationship instead of settling the fight with each other. They believe life moves on and they could create new ones along the way, but to me, I believe in the devil you have known for years than the angel you are meeting for the first time.
The reason is that the devil you have known for years would have been with you, knowing each other's flaws, attitudes, behaviours etc while a first time angel could end up harming you. Though it may take years to build your trust with each other, it can't be compared to someone you have known for years.
Even if I have to cut off from a friendship, it would be on a good note so that it would be easy to smile at each other when we meet somewhere else in the future.
In my tribe, they say that when you have known your mistake, you wouldn't stay too long begging for forgiveness, but in a situation, you do not understand how or why something happened, the other person might not tell you what you did and he or she may decide not to forgive you. My friend said she didn't know what she did and even when she had gone to meet the other lady, she was not ready to open up and this breaks her heart the more.
If one truly cherish friendship, he or she would do what it takes to get it back. The love has grown so much that it's hard to let go. She is working her best to make it work again and I hope they resolve it.
Thanks for your time on my blog.
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Some friendships could cost someone if it's lost. I always guide my friendship with care, I don't have many closed friends. I have only two, but I can't toy with those two and I can't cut ties with them.
I think that friend did something bad to the other one, she needs to meet physically and ask for forgiveness instead of asking what she did wrong.
She can't just change to her without any reason, someone might have passed the wrong accusation to the other one.
The best to go about this situation is to meet with her friend physically and they will discuss the situation.
She said she has met with her on different occasions and this lady isn't ready to open up. She just wants to end it that way which isn't good. I think she is just too hard, I mean the other lady who isn't ready to open up.
Sometimes, two people need to work. I have met people who just changed on me for no reason. We were suposed to be best friends and we were together for almost five years. She'd always switch up on me and I would be the one apologizing because I really valued what we had until the day I couldn't anymore. We haven't spoken since then after she humiliated me in public. Sometimes, people can just change with no valid reason other than you have made yourself too available and they take it for granted.
That's serious, and that's not a genuine friend.
A genuine friend will find it difficult to lose the friendship.
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I feel sorry for your friend I hope her friend will open up to her and settle things between them. Not knowing what she did wrong can hurt really bad since she cares so much about their friendship.
She really do care and she is wanting to know what was wrong so she could apologize and return back to being friends but this lady isn't ready to open up even after calling her to know what was wrong.
Something might have transpired between them that her friend is not ready to talk about. She should learn how to move on instead of feeling hurt.
since it's been a while that she has been trying to make it work .
Yes, I told my friend the same thing. If she has done her part and the other lady isn't ready, the she should just forget and move on. Perhaps the other one would change her mind.
Yeah, that will be the best thing for her.
I am sorry for what your friend went through, losing a long time friendship hurts because we get very attached to the person, however when there is true friendship there is forgiveness between both parties and the friendship is reconciled, I hope your friend reaches that option.
I hope so too. She needs to get her friendship back. Thanks for reading.
Oh this is sad to hear...
You know, sometimes though - a relationship just finds its natural end. And we might fight to stay in that friendship for longer because we feel that we have so many years invested in it.
But do we?
Or is it just time passing and we are counting up the years as something valuable, when really - we haven't been pouring anything INTO that friendship.
Sometimes people just realize this after too long, and it comes more as a shock to our pride that someone would want to let the relationship go... but we have to ask ourselves - HAVE WE been true friends? or have we just let things slide into complacency?
I don't know - from what you read, it sounds like the girl is really truly sad - but you know what? If it was meant to be, it can be rekindled again.
She might just need to fight for it! She can show up at the friends house with a gift of friendship - she can write a sweet note of appreciation... she can surprise her by taking her out on a little girlfriend date...
if she really wants it back , she can fight for it and see what happens :)
Yes, I also believe that some friendships are meant to end in some ways but we feel so hurting when we didn't expect it to go down that way especially knowing how much time we have invested in it. Though we all have our reasons, but sometimes, we shouldn't let the little or tiny mistakes destroy what has been built for years. Then if it happens, it means such a person do not value the relationship right from time.
I told my friend to be patient too. I do want to visit both of them, take them out on an outing so we can talk and resolve things back, but at the moment, I am having some responsibilities I really need to handle in my family. Then, I would think of travelling over to their state. This is my intention.
While waiting for that, I will keep telling my friend to always chat her up, call her, text her so the other one would know she still cares. Perhaps, that might make her change her mind. I hope so.
Thank you so much, Momma 💕
I feel very sad to hear that 😥
So sad
I hope they resolve it too. This is a sad one for your friend.
So sad. That's my hope too.
Thank you 😊
I dont wast thank you for mouth. Dash me billion dollar. I want to send it to Nigeria government for Census.
Oh dear, this is so heartbreaking. I really hope that they resolve it because true friendships are really hard to find nowadays.
I totally don't know why people would want to break a friendship of so many years.
Friendship just ending like that? I believe if someone truly wants something, they would do all they can to protect it. I feel sorry for your friend and I hope she has the strength to carry on.
She will have to carry on oo. Since the other lady isn't giving her chance again. It's just so sad though.
Losing friendship is kinda a disaster! I know the feeling as my one and only best friend ditched me all of a sudden.
I was clueless, she just deactivated her FB acct where we are friends, create a new one without adding me
Her number also doesn't work.
We've been friends for decades 🥹
That must hurt you as well. It´s painful when we are being ghosted without having any reason for it. Your friend didn´t act right and it´s a wrong thing.
Thanks for sharing your experience with me.
It was! I was bothered for weeks!
It's not really easy for her because she values her relationship with her. Maybe it was her past deeds that was reopened by someone and it made the other partner lock up. But whatever reason it might be because 16 years is not a small time , that's an investment.