I am going to keep bugging you about it until you finally buy that machete. Maybe you just need to start carrying around some hedge trimmers. That might be less threatening... I understand why so much is built out of stone over there given the propensity you folks have to burning things down...
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I would love a machete mate, more so for the back of my house which is similar to the gardens of 'Stone Wharf'. Nothing would please me more than to scythe away all this crap and also for doubling up in UX.
They are considered deadly weapons and I would end up in jail. You can't carry shit around like that over here!
Pffft. Dangerous. It's not like it is a gun or anything :)
How about these:
https://www.amazon.com/Professional-EZ-Travel-Collection-Telescopic/dp/B07KNRR9NK
Those are garden shears, not a machete! You get arrested over here for carrying around a knife.. never mind anything bigger.
That's what I am saying, if you can't carry around a machete, maybe you should get a pair of these.