Often, sometimes multiple times per day, we're faced with a decision where we ask ourselves "what's the right thing to do"?
And we frequently utilize a plethora of resources in our search for the answer.
Much like Who Wants to be a Millionaire we will call a friend, or see what's most popular.
Unfortunately our important decisions rarely net us a bankroll with multiple zeros! Yet they usually are capable of determining the trajectory of our very lives.
Listening to the opinion of our loved ones is a very good practice- they are in our lives because we treasure them and their opinions do provide valuable insight.
However, we oftentimes overlook the most important opinion of all: our own.
You know that moment when, after all the going back and forth over a dilemma, many sleepless nights weighing options, and multiple deep soul searching talks with friends, that moment that it just hits you: you've known what to do all along.
That moment. When you just sigh and resolve yourself to that answer that's been the answer the whole time.
You know what to do.
Why do we search outside ourselves when the answer is already within us?
Sometimes it's because of fear. Fear of making the wrong choice. Fear of making the unpopular choice. Or fear of making a choice all by yourself.
And sometimes it's because we're searching for validation.
But so many times we find that after all that sweat and tears and time, we've known the right answer the whole time.
And we knew that we knew, we were just unwilling to admit it to ourselves just yet.
Do your soul a favor and trust yourself the next time you have a decision to make.
Before you start searching outside yourself for the answer, be kind to your self and realize you know what to do.
Your confidence, as well as your conscious, will thank you :)
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I'm a firm believer in making decisions for oneself. Listen to other people's perspectives sure; Their insight, past experiences, or information may help us see things differently and from angles we may not have considered, however the decision itself has to be ones' own. In my opinion.
I believe this as I am a believer in ownership of self; Of ones' actions, attitudes, responsibilities and ultimately success and failures. Being lead into a decision shifts that ownership away from oneself opening up potential issues later.
I agree with the "do your soul a favour and trust yourself" comment you make...But not just because we may know what's best for ourselves, or should trust in ourselves...Doing so shows ownership and removes the possibility for resentment towards another person if the decision they may have lead us to making didn't go to plan or as foreseen. Make the decision yourself and there's no one to blame, except oneself.
Ultimately we are responsible to ourselves and making decisions with that premise in mind is a more satisfactory method. We get to own our success, and of course, our failures too. But hey, failure brings us closer to success so I've never been afraid of it, or of making hard decisions on my own.
It's just how I am. It has worked for me.
Good post AK.
I asked my teenage son his observations on why many people his age resist so when faced with making a decision.
He said it's because they feel their future is uncertain. And because so many of them have so much handed to them, not only by their parents but by programs in society, their schools, etc. He said that pretty much anything one needs will be given to them. By someone... So they really don't feel the need to have to make any decisions...
This is a frightening thought...
I applaud your way of life. Taking responsibility for ones own actions is brave and shows strong character.
[Gulp...] Yep, that's some scary sh*t right there...That expectation ethos that the young people have...They'll find out too late that they were wrong, in my humble opinion.
While decision making is hard, it is sometimes harder to look back at a taken decision and wondering if you made the right choice or not.
The problem is that when looking back, you have to look back with the knowledeg you had when taken the decision and not with the current knowledge. The current knowledge can only be used for future decisions but not to judge a previous decision.
Cheers,
Peter
True. It may be harder because, as the old adage goes, we should not look back or forward- the past is gone and the future yet to come, and therefore we should spend most of our time in the present... There may be some golden grains of wisdom in that!
This is such a valid question! Why DO we do that and second guess ourselves. We ALWAYS inherintly know what is best for us.
Fear. Uncertainty.
Habit.
The third is probably most prevalent. Because once we start doing it It's like Pringles and we can't stop. Lol. It's funny but not.
hehehe yes, I hear you! :)
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Awe. Thank you so much <3
I often find myself having a hard time making decisions. But when I do it is unmovable and firm. We learn from our mistakes and know what decisions to make moving on. Well one thing I try to teach my kids is making the right choices and share my experiences. Still it is up to them to make the choice.
I wonder what the world would look like if our children learned from our experiences so as not to make the same mistakes...
I can't imagine it, so surely it would be unrecognizable!
Most our fears making irrational decisions if we really look back, are normally made trying to please others or fit in.
One way or the other you will regret some decisions made, living with them, learning from them is what makes who we are.
Find one person who lives without regret, you might as well make your own decisions growing in self-confidence.
I believe that learning/growing from poor and even bad decisions brings a more profound "human experience" and impacts you on a deeper subconscious level.
Most definitely, burn yourself once you will most definitely remember.