Yesterday I went for a walk and sat down in a café, next to me was a table with two ladies in their 70's and I could not stop myself from paying attention to their conversation.
They were talking about what's been up in the news lately (Covid related riots and unconstitutional measures, Afghanistan, so on and so forth) and saying how the world became ruthless and violent day by day.
This took me back to childhood times when grown-ups were having "grown-up conversations" that I was not allowed to participate but I would always have an ear up.
They use to say the same thing.
I cannot say I disagree but in other terms.
Since time and memorial humans have been killing and slaying others for the most diverse reasons.
But nowadays attacks seem to feel heavier and seem there's only negativity.
In my honest opinion, a lot has to do with the amount of information that we let get to us.
If something happened 40 or 30 years ago we would have news about it the same, but never within a couple of seconds.
We would have a "break" of a couple days (or hours until the newspapers were out) to digest the information that was given to us.
Those "breaks" were really important for us to get our mind off the subject, whilst online we get more and more information at each refresh and we end up not digesting or even think about the matter, we just gather and worry.
This can be taken to our personal lives and relationships as well.
Don't we all have that friend who we love unconditionally but from time to time we feel the need to be alone so we can recharge? Or is it just me?
Either way, nowadays more than ever life is like clockwork and planned meticulously because there's no time to waste.
And time and time again I get overwhelmed and I honestly just want to run to the woods and live with the wolves.
So when I get caught up in that whirlpool I like to allow myself a moment "off the radar".
How would that be?
I really had to turn that phone off
I go somewhere I like or new (usually gets the best result) and I sit there.
No real reason at all: I'm not waiting for someone, I'm not making time, nothing.
Giving me the liberty to stay as long as I want.
Bringing back the feeling of "new" to the "old" city.
Feeling anonymous, no one around me knows my name, age, or what I work with.
Regaining control of your life sometimes can be hard, but at that moment I own everything back, no traumas, no anxiety.
Savoring these moments.
No phone.
No one knows where I am or what I'm doing.
In that sense, I feel truly regrouping, like taking 3 steps back to see the bigger picture (which often is a very hard task for me).
I can read a book, listen to music or just sit on a street bench watching people go by on their own life time-lapse.
Who is the blonde girl with a champagne glass at 5 PM on a Saturday?
No one will ever know... besides me
Striking up conversations with strangers out of the blue usually is a no-no for me but one day an old man stopped me while I was on my way to a store and being a woman I already get my guards up, but the old man just wanted to share a riddle and so be it.
The old man decided to give me a math riddle, the poor man had no clue I'm terrible at math.
But there is an example of how nice it is, I will never see the old man again and he doesn't know I'm bad at math and he'll just remember me as a very slow at calculating but nonetheless nice girl who listened to him.
When we go on our phones right away we strike that "I'm busy no time to talk" figure that turns us unapproachable.
You don't need to do it for hours, nor do you have to leave the house.
Sometimes I do this at home, for a week.
Whenever I feel recollected I then proceed to get back to my phone and get in touch with those who were worried about me while I was "out".
So I guess, yes.
For me going off the radar is a luxury.
Has anyone tried something like this?
Yeah, all the time
I call it falling off the map, and it's critical for my mental health
It has upset people in the past when I don't get back to them right away
It allows my introverted personality to not get overwhelmed, so I don't feel bad about it
Most people don't understand what that means
And when you try to explain it to someone: "so, being around people drains my energy; I can't do it for too long" they generally don't want to listen
Or they take it personally, like I'm telling them: "you drain me"
Which is usually not the case
¯\_ (ツ)_/¯
I'm just trying to get by, like everyone else
We all have things that work for us which don't for others
omg yes!
That's exactly it!
For those who get attacked I used to be bothered and tried to over-explain it and still they got offended, but that was good, I came to realize how those who truly care, respect my time
And for those I got a new approach "just like your phone I have a battery, but a "social battery". if your phone dies, you recharge it, that's the same for me"
It's good to know I'm not the only one like this :D :D
That's a really good way to put it!
Sometimes me too. There are no hate, no greed, no selfishness in a wolf pack. They accept each other, and they work together. And they can build a relationship towards humans. They can even accept you as a pack member.
They are so awesome!
I don't think I'll actually move in with them, but a Wolfdog is bound to happen
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