Shhhhh...
I've been quiet these days, and it's made me simultaneously calm and anxious. I've been looking forward to this Kindness Challenge so much with @gregscloud and the Kindness Community - and a few weeks ago, I would haven't have had a clue that most of the kindness that I was spending, would have to be directed inward more than outward.
"You have to give yourself permission to be selfish."
Have you ever heard that phrase? I don't like it. haha I really don't. I understand the sentiment behind it - but I think it's got a negative connotation. Selfishness is a negative quality. Caring for yourself is a positive thing. I think when we tell people that they have to "give themselves permission to be selfish" we're actually reinforcing that CARING FOR THEMSELVES is a selfishly motivated action. And it's not.
It's generous.
It's necessary.
It's loving.
It's kind.
To yourself. It's a beautiful thing to be selfless with others, but it is just as beautiful to lavish yourself in well-needed care and concern. Taking time away from the stress and strain that surrounds us daily - is a thing that requires wisdom, balance, and confidence.
I lack all three of those things, because I rarely will pause and tend to this very human body and mind of mine.
The last few weeks have required me to not only pause - but stop. It's been scary. It truly has. There were days when I panicked - thinking "but who is manning the helm for DreemPort?" And then I looked into the hallways and rooms and saw our beautiful "teem" doing what they do best. Caring for others, helping and guiding, standing in the gap - and I took a deep sigh of relief and was so grateful for this God-given gift of this amazing Dreem Teem.
@gregscloud - we spoke earlier, and you reassured me that I never had to apologize for taking time away. And that KINDNESS given to me, by you - was exactly what I needed. I thought this month would be so much different for me - but it was JUST what I needed. And your "self-kindness" prompts were such a blessing for me to wrap around me like a warm, fluffy blanket. Thank you for going above and beyond this month to exude Kindness from every pore! You are the epitome of it, Sir - and we are so grateful to have experienced this journey with you!!
I peeked at the prompts this week, and my inclination is that this post is really pointed more towards the "what I'm giving to the future generations of kindness." My daughter is so much like me. She goes and goes, and gives so much more than she ever receives. I love that she has this gift of generosity - but I hope that I can help her to see that she is just as worthy of that generosity from others - and more importantly, herself. I don't want to diminish her desire for giving to others. I just want her to balance it out with luxurious amounts of love for her beautiful self as well.
Thank you, once again, @gregscloud for SHOWING us kindness in action this month. You are so appreciated!!! I hope that what you gave us takes root and bears fruit for years to come in our dreemer family!
Thanks to @shadowspub, @penderis, @bluefinstudios, @kemmyb, @wesphilbin, @melinda010100, @samsmith1971, @silversaver888, @lizelle, @kenechukwu97, @jacoalberts, @acgalarza, @blackdaisyft, @balikis95, @alessandrawhite, and @dreemsteem for making the @dreemport voting power go farther! ❤️
image created by me and Midjourney
Permission granted! 🤐🤐🤐
Selfishness has always sounded negative to me. Though, English words and their plethora of meanings is beyond coping with.
The cycles on which life runs is what keeps things going. We definitely need some fraction of the warmth we give out too, that way we get to give out more.
I do hope momma and sis find the right balance.
🙂
I agree! That's why I say - no need to be "selfish". just care for yourself! permission for that is granted hehehe
Hi honey! hope you missed me as much as I missed you hehehe
I think I need to be selfish, sometimes too, lol.
As much as we need to show kindness to others, we should also find time to do so to ourselves and that in someway is being selfish, but I tell you, it's good for our general well-being.
I've equally enjoyed this month's challenge and have been a bit more intent on showing kindness.
Thanks to you and Greg.
heheh nope - no need to be selfish at all.... just love yourself! Don't believe the world when they say that THAT is being selfish. it's not - i promise!!! It's a big HUG to yourself - and hugs are never selfish!! :)
I'm so glad that you enjoyed this month!!! Greg did a fabulous job!!!
This reminder is filled with kindness. It would appear that one doesn't need to be reminded to take care of self but in reality, not everyone remembers and just like your daughter we keep on giving, even more than we receive.
It's important to be self aware and know that we are worthy of care from others and even from ourselves.
No matter how selfless we are, if we don't take care of ourselves, we won't even be okay enough to help others in the long run. Hence, self-care is an integral part of selflessness.
Well said!
And these bodies and minds that we host are GIFTS - and we are supposed to be good stewards with these gifts!
I don't think God would appreciate it very much if we took His gift and ran them down into destruction! right? hehehe
so that's a good perspective to have also! Treasure these temples that we have! :)
What kinds of things have you been doing for yourself lately?
I actually just came off of a 40 day fast (no solid foods for the entire time...) and the last 10 days of it - were really mostly water, some days - just dry fast.
And it was like my Mt. Everest - of my life. I never thought I could ever do something this intense. It was probably the hardest thing I've ever done - physically, emotionally, socially, spiritually... it was so unbelievably hard.
But on day 35 - I started to have symptoms that made me think its time for me end this early. and I was absolutely devastated. Felt like I couldn't go the distance.. and I am not a quitter. And I had to realize that sometimes - it has nothing to do with quitting. It has to do with coming to the limitations as a human.
But thankfully - I prayed - a lot LOL... and found ways around my symptoms. I thought... if I don't feel better next day - I have to stop. But the next day, I was like a new person (physically) but psychologically.... even MORE difficult LOL.
its hard to explain all the feelings, but last Saturday I woke up a victor. And I was so... so... yeah. :)
but then the hard part came. coming OUT of the fast. hahaha and I was so feelng like - i just wanted to jump back into life - but i had to stop. and wait. and pull back on everything. which is very very foreign to me. i battle feelings of "guilt" when its time to take care of me. lol i feel useless and... like i'm wasting time. so i did a lot of.. relaxing. i baked. i cooked meals for my family. (which i really missed so much when i fasted- i missed just sitting down and sharing a meal with them. you can't believe how much you miss that! lol) and slept! and purposely didn't work on our project (which again made me feel terrible - but it was ok.)
so i'm not sure if this seems... anti-climactic of an answer. hahaha but yes... that's me :)
thanks for asking about me - that was nice of you to just check on me :) thanks
Awww, this is so heartwarming to me, I am so glad you were able to be kind to yourself without feeling bad about doing so. I hate the cliche, "You can't pour from an empty cup," but it is, nonetheless, true!
I too am giving myself a little kindness right now. I was feeling guilty because there are still people's blog posts I need to read and comment on, a goal I set for myself. There just isn't the time it needs to do justice to the wonderful writings. It is late now, and I have an emergency dental surgery in the morning, so rather than beating myself up to those I know I still need to read, I sent a little message. I think knowing, or I hope that knowing I want to give the posts my full attention and give a proper thoughtful response will be understood.
So I sent a little note to that effect to those I know I still have not gotten to. I have learned so much myself these last 3 weeks, and it has been truly a wonderful collaboration. I want to debrief and unpack, think, and give a good report of how the experience was.
I decided I will continue the challenge, not officially with Dreemport, but for those who are taking part that may not be doing the Dreemport portion of the challenge or want to just continue through the end of the month.
It is completely optional and not anything to do with Dreemport. I hope you have rested up a little; your daughter has had a great role model mom! LOL!
I hope the surgery goes well, and you feel better soon 🙏 Thanks so much for everything you do :)
aah, Ms. Dreems 🥰 I am so happy that you have been spending time showing up for yourself. I don't think any of us do this enough. Self-care has to come first. Fill those buckets and then you will be best positioned to share yourself, and the Lord, with others too. My buckets have been running on empty this month. I wasn't able to participate in the Kindness challenge. I'm glad though that you were able to and that you benefited so much from it.
ps: I'll lie in the long grass amongst the wildflowers, the sun on my face, staring up at the clouds with you, any day of the week. I love you muchly, my precious friend 💗🙏 !LUV !LADY
#alwaysthebeginning
#dreemerforlife
View or trade
LOHtokens.@samsmith1971, you successfully shared 0.1000 LOH with @dreemsteem and you earned 0.1000 LOH as tips. (1/3 calls)
Use !LADY command to share LOH! More details available in this post.
dreemsteem, samsmith1971 sent you LUV. 🙂 (1/10) tools | trade | connect | wiki | daily
Made with LUV by crrdlx.
My first encounter with the approval to be selfish and that selfishness is ok, was when I overheard a man advising his teenage son that he needs to be selfish in other for him to help people.
In his words, people think selfishness is bad but you need to be able to care for yourself first, and have more than enough because only then can you comfortably care or give to other people without it seeming like too much of a burden that might invoke anger.
I did learn a lot from that because truly one cannot give from a place of lack but abundance. We also cannot give what we do not have.
So Dreemy, you are very much in line with your time off. Even machines are subjected to rest after the days work.
View or trade
LOHtokens.@dreemsteem, You have received 1.0000 LOH for posting in Ladies of Hive. We believe that you should be rewarded for the time and effort spent in creating articles. The goal is to encourage token holders to accumulate and hodl LOH tokens over a long period of time.
!LADY
View or trade
LOHtokens.@ladiesofhive, you successfully shared 0.1000 LOH with @dreemsteem and you earned 0.1000 LOH as tips. (12/30 calls)
Use !LADY command to share LOH! More details available in this post.
This is beautiful Dreem. Seeing the amazing things you learned, it really was worth it. Because of school, I couldn't participate in this month's challenge but as an advocator of kindness and a bigger advocator of treating yourself right, reading this has been so enrapturing. Well-done, Dreemie. The world awaits. 🥰🥰
!LUV
dreemsteem, jhymi sent you LUV. 🙂 (2/4) tools | trade | connect | wiki | daily
Made with LUV by crrdlx.
This is a perfect partnership - Dreemport is all about kindness, support, and connection :)
This post has been manually curated by the VYB curation project
Congratulations on getting to your 40 day goal ♥️ What was it like having food after so long?
This post has been manually curated by the VYB curation project
The fact that we need to be kind to other people does not mean that we should not be able to do reasonable things for ourselves too
Sometimes, we have to be selfish for our sake
Self kindness is very important which is why I believe we can only give out what we have, Go have the rest you need dreemie.
Rather than "permission to be selfish" I say, in this month of Kindness, give yourself
Permission To Be Kind To Yourself
!LADY !BBH
View or trade
LOHtokens.@pepetoken, you successfully shared 0.1000 LOH with @dreemsteem and you earned 0.1000 LOH as tips. (1/2 calls)
Use !LADY command to share LOH! More details available in this post.
"Self love is not selfishness"
This is a statement I'm familiar with, at some point we give so much of ourselves that we forget we also need to survive. "Love your neighbour as yourself" preaches the value and significant of self love because if you don't love yourself how would you love others.
Self love and selfishness share the same boundaries, everything in life is governed by balance, as much as it is required to love ourselves, we also need to make sure that it is not at the expense of others.
We both know you needed a break it has been long overdue, I'm glad you took some time to reflect on yourself. It is good to have you back. 🤗
Pop in from #dreemport #Dreemerforlife
Caring for oneself is really necessary, most people are often so engrossed with caring for others that they forget themselves along the line. Please be selfish to yourself as often as possible.
#dreemerforlife
Being selfish sometimes to just think about yourself alone and take care of yourself is important. Even more important than some of us think it is. You can all week round be selfless and caring for other people, but you need to give yourself that too sometimes, even if it is just one day of the week.
We appreciate you taking the time, to either use #ThoughtfulDailyPost, or otherwise help this Community grow. So...
Thank you!!