I'm not really sure I suppose, all I know is what (for me and my partner) constituents good practices in respect of communication and other behaviours within our relationship and that treating each other respectfully and all the other aspects of what we feel a good relationship requires seems to work; people are free to choose their life, and they do, and the choices each make will ultimately deliver a result.
As for what kids learn in school, who knows...I suppose whatever agenda the government feel us appropriate at the time.