Yep, I expected you to say that about the events and organic relationships instead of contrived ones. We're the same in that way.
I just move on from that person. I will most likely never want to be around them again.
This is a strength in my opinion and I have it too; I'd rather be with no one than someone negative. It makes one's circle smaller but I'm ok with that; quality over quantity.
I'm a confident person, confident in myself, not arrogant, just confident and comfortable in who I am, what I know, how I converse and interact and feel no need to have others confirm it; in fact, when people do I feel it could be disingenuous. Having said that, I'm shy in social situations - not socially awkward - just shy and unwilling to be the centre of attention - happy to fade into the background - which makes doing some of the professional roles I've had a challenge. As I said in another comment on this post, I've played the parts though, worn a suit as a costume, so to speak, so I can act the part or as a suit of armour to make me feel able to do what I need to...So, I'm not sure I agree with your last comments in respect of myself, but I understand the relevance and that that situation is indeed a reality for some.
Edit: Also, I sometimes get the feeling that I'd get along with/connect with people even before I meet them in person...Have you ever had that? I can't define why, it's a feeling more than anything, but sometimes I get it quite strongly.
Let me see how I explain because I think you missed my point:
I myself cannot achieve this, that I am not affected by external things and attitudes of others. I am talking about the hypothetical case in which we could achieve this. That would be great. Because it would save us time and aggravation, to stay focused on what matters to us and who really matters to us.
And about being the center... it's the worst thing to want to be the center. Better to be on the outside, watching from the edge. These are the really smart people. They don't miss a single detail. So maybe that's why she looked at the edges.
Ah I see, sorry my mistake...Had you written it in Spanish I would have understood completely...although only if you wrote the word hola because that's the only work I know...but I'm fluent in saying it for sure! 😁
I agree with you, being unaffected by others is a strength, to be able to stand tall as ourselves and confident irrespective of whether others agree or not, or whether they seek to pull us down. That's such a powerful quality to possess.
On the centre of attention thing...I see people at these events trying to be, attempting to look like the smartest person in the room...but the thing is they gain the least from the situation; Listening and observing others is where the best will come; this is why I've honed my skills at getting people to talk and keep them talking...I learn more.
I did an edit to my last comment, I'm not sure if you saw it. 👆
👌
(edit)
Well, maybe because we spend so much time at Hive. Hahaha... Nah, seriously. I think each person has the ability to realize with a few minutes of conversation whether or not they will connect with another person. You just need to be attentive to the details. And if the other person doesn't talk that much, maybe this is what motivates even more the curiosity of wanting to get to know them, don't you think? But there will still come a time when the detail or details will give the verdict.
I agree, it comes with experience too I suppose, reading the vibe and possible connection.
On the other hand, when I talk about being oneself, I am not talking about confirmation. I'm not interested in anyone confirming anything... I'm talking about the comfort you feel with someone who speaks your language. Hola (not this one 😁) that you understand each other I mean. That they don't need to talk much to understand what one or the other wants. That's being yourself. To be accompanied by someone who loves you and accepts you as you are, without half measures.
That's called connection and it transcends physical and verbal communication. Interestingly, I wrote a post about communication today, for tomorrow. I know, I must be
psychopsychic. 😊😁 Go check out the edit I made to my comment on the little hand.
Seen it. I'm well ahead of you. Hang on, let me make this comment in Spanish. Ready?
Here you go: Hola.
Come on, you know that's all I got!
I see, you just have those survival skills. Something I really admire in you. Hahaha... crazy man! Hola, me iré a dormir.
Lol. #loco
😁🤗