heymoeshu,
im going to be critical on this, with caSE, as haiku are generally all lowered, unless proper nouned.
it also doesnt appear to compleat, as a haiku would, with a sort of final gesture or windful wistful blist of logic or heart felt lossy gain. perhaps i picked up my haiku from this book of dead philosophers, besides me -- but i THiNK! Im going to rewrite it for you --
freedom pays this flag
back again a tissue wept
risen to don bow
the last line is obtuse, in reference to how aikido master belts are counted up and one less than trained master. I guess if one was his own master, he would train others, so
risen don bows known
peace!
Thank you for the critique! As I look at it again. I can see that you're totally right. While I have never really followed the case rule, I do try to hit the mark on that final gesture and I didn't really accomplish that here. But I do like your re-write though, especially the final line. Thanks for your input.