Softness and life
gently packed closely
In bonds of three
On it the dead float
under it the living
transcend into the void
It’s very memory is profound
existing even before men did,
witnessing the rise
and fall of empires
Running on and over everything
Like a map through time itself
Oh the tales it could tell
Of war and of love
Of unjust men twisting
the tales of history
Of the birds that
exist no more
and of the beasts
that could terrify
you to the bone
with a sound and a stare
Softness and life
bearing witness
but sharing no tales
giving life
giving death
A map we barely see
A book we cannot read
such is the mystery
the mystery of softness
the mystery of blue and depth
the mystery of water.
The form of this poem matches its theme excellently. I love how the first stanza introduces the subject of the element of water and creates an implicit connection with the number 3. I like the varying length of the stanzas and the simple, flowing sounds of the words.
Thank you @strivenword for your kind words.
Like @pregosauce mentioned, I thought the idea of water as a silent witness was interesting. I also thought the variability of the form, like the number and length of lines, was a good thematic tie to the subject matter -- both poetry and water can vary in how they flow.
You’re totally right, I didn’t even see it along those lines. The idea of varying number of lines in each verses just felt right.
Thanks for your comment
Water as witness is a really interesting concept to explore, and with the added idea that it is a mute or at least uncommunicating witness is also really interesting. I really like how you went beyond 'the ocean holds its secrets deep' idea to give water a kind of eternally watching role. lovely!
I always found the idea of water interesting, how it’s woven into the very fabric of our lives and our biology. Everything alive has been touched by water.
I’m really glad you enjoyed this piece.
Water in us, water around us :)
what a beautiful image and what a beautiful poem, simply spectacular, without water there would not be what we enjoy today called life, a hug.
Thank you @joseitosanchezs