You are viewing a single comment's thread from:

RE: I stop spanking my child

in Motherhood3 years ago

Yes you are right @bobthebuilder2, I don't hit my son but that doesn't mean I don't scold nor punish him. I'm doing what you said and as I said in my comment. My son listens to me out of fear, he only listens to me and me alone even though I haven't spanked him not even once.

For me unconditional love is to love without condition, it doesn't mean you don't discipline your child but to love them no matter what happens. If they grow to be a criminal then I will still love him. It doesn't mean I will tolerate what he does. As a father it is our duty to guide our children well that's for me personally. We have different views on how fatherhood/parenting should be done. I was once a battered child that is why I don't want my son to experience the trauma. I don't want my son to have the same relationship as my father. Me and my father, we don't talk and I don't care about him at all. I don't want my son and me to be like that. I want to be my sons best friend in the future so whenever he has problems he can come and talk to me. It doesn't mean I'm spoiling him by giving him what he wants. I just want to be there for him like any friend that cares for you would.

My grandfather acted as my father and my best friend when I was growing, that is why I also want my son and me to be like that. I can tell whatever problems I have to my grand father and he would always give me the best advice in the world. He taught me more than any father would and I love that. When he died I felt lost and almost went crazy as the only person who would listen to almost any problem of mine have died. I have no one else to talk to now, but then I thought I'm a man now and it's time to repay the favor. It's my time to listen and to teach now, so I'm teaching my son all the time, I don't know if there are times he gets annoyed by me always talking and teaching him how to be become a real man in the future but that's what I do almost every single day.

Anyway thanks for your detailed comment. I'm pretty sure you are a great father and I hope you continue to be. Love your children no matter what. Cheers mate