When I saw this week's #weekend-engagement topics on Friday, I had a few things in my mind, the last one:
What's the most difficult thing you've ever had to do and why?
I think it is the best one here, for all of us who would like to share with the rest of the community something that we never had the opportunity to tell, something that hurt us the most and that remained etched in our memories for a long time.
Like @triplug, I thought I'd share with you that difficult moment of my life.
I understand and sympathize with his sadness, which he experiences again just by remembering the loss of his parents, his mother.
I lost my father less than 5 years ago.
The day he died was a Sunday.
Since the hospitals were closed due to the flu epidemic (right before the announcement of the Corona virus epidemic, which I think also took him as a victim, because he was being treated for leukemia and died due to problems with the respiratory system), I drove around noon, called him on his mobile phone, he went out on the balcony of his room and we talked for a few minutes, looking at each other from a distance...
And around 7:00 p.m., he was no longer in this world.
It was hard for me to leave so quickly.
And it was even more difficult for me when a few days later I went shopping for the wardrobe in which he will be buried and going to the morgue for identification. I could not look from the side next to the open coffin, I had to look at the gray face of my dead father to identify him.
What an inhumane and painful task for a family member, but I guess it has to be...
And now that I remember, I get a lump in my throat...
And this morning, when I saw that triplug had already written about this topic, the same situation, I thought of something else, which also brought me great weight after I did it.
I participated in a large project, the construction of an object.
I was a member of the team that responded to the investor and from whom we had guidelines and directives.
The IT systems in that project were implemented by a friend of the investor (and a friend of mine with whom I had excellent cooperation and friendship for over 10 years).
But, that contractor in the IT part, at some point in the presentation of the price for the IT system, quoted the investor a much higher amount than what I had predicted and previously announced.
And he said that I demanded everything he offered, at the prices he gave.
Poof... a ten-year friendship bursts like a soap bubble.
The call from the investor meant that I couldn't sleep peacefully for several nights (that is, all those nights when I was at home, after regular work, looking at spreadsheets and making new calculations)...
And as a summary, I asked for a meeting with an investor, where I had to present the attempt to "steal" his friend, as well as my friend...
No matter how hard it was for me to do it, I had to, because it was expected of me, but on the other hand, I also wanted to, because with the contractor's comment, I was unfairly condemned for a large expenditure of money, which, as the calculations showed, should probably have ended in the pocket of the contractor (a friend of the investor, from whom he would have taken it).
I didn't want to take revenge, after all, this is a man I've been friends with for years, and that's why it was hard for me to destroy our friendship with a correct report of expenses... But it's a little easier for me, because I think that it's only he.
There were still many difficult decisions in my life that I had to make and implement. but these two situations, from the recent period, left a strong impression on me and I will always remember them as very screwed up for me...
I read your comment pretty soon after you wrote it, but honestly after actually reading it and seeing that you lost someone dear to you, I couldn't write anything.
In my case, I was very attached to my mother, in fact this was the same on both sides.
For almost a year I used the corridors of the hospital and, seeing my mother in many moments of suffering, I think it shortened my life by at least ten years.
I'm more sensitive and such cases affect me deeply but in the end I keep telling myself that this is life and we are just passing through this world.
I hope mom is in a much better place.
Thank you very much for your comment.
Thanks for your reply 🫶
No matter how well we understand the transience of life, it is always difficult when someone we love leaves. You think so, it would hurt less if no one loved you (or you loved someone), but life without love is sad.
And in the end someone hurts.
Who said it would be easy?
We are exposed to any delicate, complex and difficult situation, especially when parents pass away and we have to do this type of management.
I have not been able to see my father taken out of the box even though he died in my arms... I cannot...
And so unimaginable things happen, but we must try not to think too much about it and continue on our way.
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger...
That's right, only the soul should not become so hardened.
Excellent day to you.
🌻