Thank you for writing in The Ink Well.
You bring us a relatively short story focused entirely on narrative. Remember that it is important to balance the trio of narrative, action, and dialogue very carefully so that the reader can be drawn into and along with the story as it progresses. You want to immerse your reader rather than simply tell them everything that is happening as it happens. You may find this link to some resources helpful in this regard.
https://peakd.com/hive-170798/@theinkwell/writing-tip-of-the-week-26-action-dialog-and-narrative-the-dynamic-trio
I highly appreciate these suggestions as I post my writings, I know is a request for the contest the mixture among narrative, action, and scene, but my story was intentionally wrote in a narrative way in this occasion. I enjoyed the process and the result of immerse the reader was satisfied as I could check from Cecilia who couldn't stop reading from the very beginning to the end 😁