Your story shares that it is difficult to stay focused on goals when concerns of popularity and influence enter the picture. The story has a strong moral around staying true to yourself.
To strengthen your stories, we recommend that you incorporate action and dialog. Stories that are all narrative without action and dialog are less likely to engage the reader. Here are a few resources for you:
- Learn about the concepts of "show" don't "tell": called Show, Don't Tell.
- Learn about the magic trio of action, dialog and narrative.
Good luck and keep writing.
Thank you for your feedback and the help.