Renee ran her pale, slender fingers through her sleek, unkempt red hair. "I hope Grandma Reilly will be alright," she whispered.
The phone rang, and she pounced on it as if it might escape her eager grasp. She held it to her ear, pressing so hard that it was painful.
A man's calm, pleasant voice came through. "Hello, I called to find out if you have any life insurance. Are your loved ones protected if the unthinkable were to happen?"
Renee slammed the phone receiver onto the table. After bouncing several inches into the air, it landed on the edge.
She didn't bother to rescue it, or even find out if her caller was still on the line. Instead she placed both hands on the table, and leaned close.
"The unthinkable might have already happened! And how would I know, with you wasting my time?" she whispered dangerously. Pausing for a moment, she drew in a deep breath. "NEVER CALL THIS NUMBER AGAIN!!!" she roared.
When Renee finished, she put it back on the cradle, very gently. Unconsciously she began to pace. Her beautiful young features were contorted, smooth cheeks wet.
"What's taking so long? Aunt Nina promised to call me as soon as possible if I stayed here to watch Henry when he got home from school."
The phone rang again. This time she picked it up with more skepticism. "Hi, I'm so glad I finally found you. I have some wonderful news Renee, and you'll never guess what it is in a million years!" gushed a very excited young woman.
Renee put the phone by her long, muscular leg. When it was firmly muffled, she sighed loudly. Then the distraught young woman took a calming breath.
"I'm really happy for you, Sonia. But I can't talk right now, I'm waiting for a very important call." Without waiting for a reply, she hung up.
The phone rang again. "Hello?" she tried, hoping that she was wrong about the caller's identity.
She wasn't wrong.
A slightly hysterical female voice was coming through. "Why did you hang up on me, are you angry? Did I do something wrong?"
"I'm sorry, Sonia. I'll explain later, but I have to keep the line free. It's urgent, and Aunt Nina doesn't have call waiting. I promise I'll call you as soon as I can."
Again she hung up without waiting, but this time the phone remained silent.
Twenty minutes later, it still hadn't made a sound. "I almost wish someone would call, even a wrong number," she admitted.
After another hour, a boy trudged into the tidy living room. He hung his Incredible Hulk backpack on its hook by the door, then walked over to her.
"Hi, Renee. Why are you staring at the phone?"
"Oh, hi Henry. I'm waiting for a call. Why don't you go get a snack? You can eat it in the basement, and watch your shows on the big TV."
Henry beamed. "Wow, thanks! Maybe you can come down too, after you finish your call."
Renee forced a smile. "If there's time, I will."
After he had gone downstairs, she resumed her vigil. Nothing happened.
Frustrated, the nervous woman searched in vain for something to occupy her mind. "Not so much as a magazine? What do you do in here, Aunt Nina?"
Carefully she pulled the phone as far as it would go towards the kitchen, then left it on the floor. "I know I'll hear it from there, with the door open."
She proceeded to make Aunt Nina's favorite meal: spaghetti and meatballs. "No matter what, this will be the perfect meal for her," she thought grimly.
All too soon, the meal was ready. "Still no call? There has to be some news."
Heart pounding, Renee approached the phone as if it were a coiled viper. She gingerly picked it up, and carried it to its rightful place on the table.
"Hello, I'm calling about my grandmother. Mrs. Reilly."
The receptionist had a curt, even rushed demeanor. "Your grandmother is no longer in our care, Ma'am."
Speechless, Renee sank to the floor. A few seconds later, she covered her face with both hands. "I can't believe you're gone. I'm going to miss you so much," she whispered. Then she began to sob.
Perhaps twenty minutes later, she heard the front door. "I've got to pull it together before Aunt Nina sees me," Renee thought. She idly noted the phone receiver next to her. Indistinct, rushed words were emanating from it.
Before she could dry her eyes and get up, an impossible sight greeted her. Renee's world spun in circles, then faded to black.
When she awoke, three familiar faces were peering down at her. Aunt Nina, Henry, and Grandma Reilly. She rubbed her eyes. "I'm sorry, Aunt Nina. I think I'm hallucinating."
Aunt Nina smiled. "You're not hallucinating, you misunderstood the receptionist. Grandma Reilly didn't pass away, she was released. The poor woman was still on the phone when we walked in, she feels awful."
Renee sat up, the world slowly beginning to make sense. "But how? She was taken out of here in an ambulance five hours ago."
Aunt Nina shrugged. "After they ran their tests, she insisted on coming home. I think that's why the receptionist was so abrupt, none of the hospital staff seemed especially happy about her refusing to at least spend the night."
Renee sank into the couch, relief flooding through her body. "Next time, please just call me..."
This story was set in a time before cell phones.
Cover image made in Canva Pro using their gallery
hahaha, Reene must have been perplex all through the wait. what an interesting story
I'm glad you liked it :)
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Renee poor woman who was scared, she thought she had lost her beloved grandmother. Fortunately it was just a misunderstanding, a very funny situation after the real news is known. As always a pleasure to read you.
Thanks for sharing.
Good day.
Thanks so much, I'm glad you didn't see the twist coming :)
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Clever story, @wrestlingdesires! Misunderstandings can be both frightening and hilarious.
We have some feedback for you. Your character descriptions are nice, but here's something to think about. The story is Renee's. We are seeing and experiencing the world through her eyes. And so the description of her sleek hair, beautiful young features, and her long muscular leg are rather out of place. These might be the observations of a man watching her, but she wouldn't make those observations herself.
Check out the article we referenced in the prompt post about writing character descriptions which explains this concept very well.
Thanks so much 🙌 Suggestions like this are exactly what I'm looking for ♥️
Thank you for being open to feedback! You're awesome!
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Renee was very worried and distressed and the poor phone and callers suffered the consequences. I really liked how you described her state almost on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Very good story.
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Thanks so much :) I have to say that your writing is reaching a new level of great, by the way 🙌
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May this be a wonderful day for youThank you very much @wrestlingdesires. It is an honor for me to read your comment and I receive it with much love.