I quit my job due to physical reasons, and after that, I spent a while to cultivate at home. After that, I have been busy with home affairs, cleaning up the house, moving, etc. When I was free, I found that it was the end of the year.
Although the job has always been clerical, the last job was very good for a small third-tier city like me, both in terms of salary and salary. To be honest, it is a pity to resign, but no matter how good it is. My job is for a better life, and health is an indispensable condition for a better life, so I still chose to resign under the extremely unfortunate circumstances.
To be honest, it is indeed a very bad time of the year to think about looking for a job when you are done with homework. There are very few good job opportunities, so I have not been too anxious, but the two months I stayed at home made me realize that , When I quit my job at home, I was not afraid of looking for a job, not afraid of endless interviews, and not afraid of my inner anxiety. Instead, I was afraid of the shortcomings of my parents.
Although I have always felt that I am not afraid of other people's evaluations of me, and I am not afraid of being the talk of others after dinner, but once these other people become family members and relatives, to be honest, it really hurts my heart.
An incident a few days ago may have been my flashpoint. A few days ago, my relatives came to my house as a guest. I wanted to go out at the time, but my mother didn’t like to go out to eat because it was cold, so I insisted on staying at home and helping them order meals at noon. . After ordering the meal, I just received a call for an interview. Because I didn’t want to be at home, I directly made an appointment for an interview in the afternoon. Later, my relatives had left after returning home. As a result, within a few days, I found that in the family's WA group, this relative A and another relative B began to talk about their visit to my house that day. Later, they talked about my job interview, about my jobless status and my job search. We talked for a long time (because they sent a voice message in the group at 6:00 in the morning, so when I saw it, except for the dozens of unread voice messages left in the group, the topic was completely over) .
I am quite disgusted with this matter. I think it is very impolite to comment and discuss other people's affairs in the group of all relatives, and I feel emotionally violated. I originally wanted to talk to my mother about this (because she is a relative on her side), if you want to discuss other people's affairs, you can chat privately, but no one knows about it. Listening to the voice in the group with a smile, after I said my opinion, she not only didn't think so, but said that what people said was the truth, something. Immediately I was completely speechless.
In fact, I don't understand the thoughts of parents and relatives. This incident is only one of them. Usually, when I am a big aunt, or when I have a marriage problem, my relatives who will be notified by my mother in less than half a day know about it. I have no doubts about her love for me at all, but every time this happens, it makes me feel a little unacceptable in my heart.
Gradually, I would rather tell my friends than my family about many things. I thought I could spend more time with my family after resigning, but even if I was at home, I was only willing to do my own thing behind closed doors. We talked about it countless times, and even quarreled about it, but every time it was over, because I couldn't convince all my relatives who didn't tell me about my story, and I couldn't convince myself to accept it either.
I love my family, but I'm slowly discovering that maybe I don't know how to love anymore.