There are only two days left in November. This week, the Christmas market opened early in my city, so I took my daughter to see it. November is the month I struggle with the most in Germany in the last 11 years. Walking through the cheerful Christmas atmosphere in the city was a relief. I made it through November again this year.
Germany is at a latitude of around 50 degrees, which is even farther north than Hokkaido, the northernmost part of Japan. While I can handle the cold, what gets to me is the short daylight hours and the frequent cloudy or rainy days from autumn into early winter. Adding to this, I have some difficult memories tied to this time of year—like searching for an apartment in the past and breaking down in tears on the street several times when I couldn’t find one.
This year also had its share of challenges: a final blow from the landlord of my previous office, frustrating communication issues at work, arguments with my partner, and the struggle to gather documents to apply for a new office lease, which left me feeling like I hadn’t yet achieved full independence. On top of all that, my entire family were sick and tired so I canceled a workshop. In the end, it was a good decision as I could take rest.
But when I look back through my notebook, I see that even in the midst of these struggles, there were positive moments. I discovered a great book, learned how to use new tools at a woodworking workshop, built confidence by driving to unfamiliar places, managed to secure a viewing for a new office, and welcomed a healthy, vigorous yuzu tree and so on. I even successfully catered for 100 people. Chats with friends at a café and comments I received on my Hive posts also lifted my mood. I cooked and enjoyed delicious meals, and those small joys reminded me that there is happiness in my life.
Reflecting like this, I realize my dislike for November might make me focus more on the negatives. Writing in my notebook allows me to revisit and appreciate the good moments.
Although it’s about a month until the days start getting longer again, I look forward winter holidays. And I want to treasure the remaining days of this year and finish it on a good note.
11月も残すところあと2日です。私が住んでいる街では今週クリスマスマーケットが早々オープンしたので、子供と見に行ってきました。11月は私がドイツで一番苦手な月で、「よかった、今年も11月を乗り切れたぞ」と街中の幸せなクリスマスムードにほっと一息つきました。
ドイツの緯度は50度で、私が生まれ育った日本の中で一番北にある北海道よりもさらに北にあります。寒さは耐えられるものの、秋から冬のはじめにかけて日の光が短くなって、曇りや雨降りの日が多いのが地味にこたえます。この時期に家探しをして、なかなか家が見つからずに道端で数回泣いたなど、あまりいい思い出がないのも苦手に拍車をかけているかもしれません。
今年もなんだかんだあって、以前借りていたオフィスの大家から最後の一撃をくらったり、仕事関連の連絡がうまくいかずにやきもきしたり、相方とのコミュニケーションがうまくいかずに爆発したり、新しいオフィスを契約するにあたって書類がなかなか揃わず自立できていない気がして落ち込んだり、家族みんなで体調不良でワークショップをキャンセルしたり・・・。
でもノートを見返してみると、落ち込んでいる中でもよい本に出会ったり、木工のワークショップで新しい機械の使い方を学んだり、新しい場所に車で出かけてみて運転に自信がついたり、新しいオフィスの内見までこぎつけられたり、力強い元気な柚子の木がやってきたり、100人分のケータリングを無事終わらせられたりといいこともあったんですよね。友人とカフェで長話をして、Hiveに思っていることを書いてコメントをもらったのも元気のもとになりました。おいしいご飯を作って食べられたし、幸せではあるのです。
こうして振り返ると、11月に対する苦手意識から、ネガティブなことに目が入っているのかもしれませんね。ノートを書いておくと振り返れるのもいいですね。
日がまた長くなり始めるまでにはまだ一ヶ月ほどありますが、クリスマスや冬休みを楽しみに気分を上げて、今年の残りの日々を大事に過ごして一年を締めくくれたらと思います。
I think November is difficult for a lot of people as the temperatures drop and the days get shorter and it is so often damp and miserable. I'm glad you noticed good things happen in November, too 🙂.
I enjoy reading your blogs, you have lovely habits to sustain you - your balcony, beautiful meals, smudging (new to me and a lovely idea) and socks!
Have you read Virginia Woolf "A Room of One's Own"?
Thank you for the recommendation, Shanibeer! I ordered the book. I was wondering my mother read it. She studied English/American literatures and was big book worm 😁
Another tough one came in the end of November, no from the office ... But ja, good I tried at least and I feel more clear now. I keep on going 💪
💪 💪 💪