Panic turned me into a scared little mouse, and I kneeled down as if I was submitting myself to their powers.
This is one of the scariest things to do in life. Surrendering to your powerlessness is essentially surrendering the death, but it is at that moment that something miraculous can happen, like you described.
When I was reading your post, I was just skimming through it, but once I read this part, something changed in me. I read the whole thing from top the bottom as precisely as I could. I felt like I resonated with it. I don't have an extreme fear of the dark, but I related to what you said but in a different context.
I remember being extremely depressed in life. I struggled for year but there came a point where I essentially gave up trying to fight it and just sank into it defenseless. It was extremely scary but gave birth to such an incredible insight and healing in my mental health. I can't help but compare that moment where you submitted to stronger powers and only then experienced a life changing scenario. That is what happened it me. It was on the cusp of death and defeat, but surrendering to it brought a miracle instead. All of my suffering and anxiety just vanished in a few seconds; as if I never suffered to begin with. What an experience.
Now I am facing another manifestation of that and your writing triggered the same realization again. Thanks for reminding me of something extremely important!