I had a late child and so I recently took the role of caregiver (the last 21 years) since my wife had a much better job than I did. I took a lot of grief from people who told me that since I wasn't a family leader, the man of the house, how could I raise a son when I was filling the role of a woman? I tried to point out that throughout most of history, man and women and their children worked together, especially fathers with their sons, but ears and minds were closed.
I was starting to see a change, and some of it is because so many more women than men are getting college degrees. As long as the social pressure is not on the men to somehow "lead" by leaving their family for 10-12 hours a day, or on women to be "real" mothers by not helping to provide for their children, it might be a lasting change.
BTW, my son turned out just fine, I homeschooled and he is an Eagle Scout and a peer leader at his College. He's already working in his field, which is a comfort to me.
@baerdric, you did a fine job in raising your son. That much is obvious. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
so sad that people gave you such a hard time for raising your family....glad you persevered and lived according to your own compass. Bravo!