My voice, already pitched in an octave that would cause erections in any nearby dogs
Really?? Your sense of humor is just crazy.
At least the police in your part are not irresponsible.
They don't pick at all and if they are picking it is after the problem has been solved or after someone has been killed.
Nice story
They are actually alright the police round my way. But they, like everyone else have gone call centre crazy and now it's hard to actually speak to one!