Please try using Ylang Ylang essential oil. Put some on your finger (maybe with a bit of olive oil) and insert. It really helped me. There was a period in my life when for some unknown reason sex was super painful. Doctors had no suggestion for me, in fact the gynecologist tried to say that I might be allergic to my husband or that he was too big -- ridiculous as it hadn't been a problem earlier in my life. I had no infection. The gynecologist told me to go about with a long skirt and no panties for a long time -- didn't help. Doctors left me to live a sexless life! There tests always revealed nothing wrong.
So one day in my researching I found it sounded like frigidity, which I thought was ridiculous since I had no bad experience with sex, but oh well ... then I looked up frigidity in my essential oils guide and it said to use Ylang Ylang oil in the vagina. So I tried it -- and it was a miracle! After a few uses I was better. For the next couple of years that pain would start to return occasionally and I would just re-insert some Ylang Ylang and it always went away quickly.
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I've never heard of that oil. Thanks for the recommendation! I'll look into it.
I also have a theory as to why it suddenly happened to me, and why it is most common amongst 15-25 year-olds. I have no proof, but it is worth considering. Like I said, I had been having sex with no problems until it suddenly became a problem. I think it could be after I had a 3-shot series of Hepatitis B vaccines around age 26. Vaccines have lots of side-effects that are not investigated or acknowledged. The HPV Vaccine started being given in 2006, and now those young girls were 15 are around 25 years old. I just googled and vaginismus is a symptom of HPV the virus itself. Sometimes the vaccines are known to give you the actual disease they are supposed to prevent. For example, people are known to get liver failure from a Hepatitis vaccine, which ironically is supposed to protect you from liver failure. People have gotten polio from the polio vaccine itself, which is why they no longer give the live polio virus vaccine in North America. A friend of mine confided in me that she knew a young girl in our town who claimed that she was a virgin (no reason not to believe her) but had been diagnosed with HPV virus AFTER getting the vaccine. So, maybe you have HPV? Maybe you got that side effect from that vaccine (assuming you have been vaccinated).
What I do know is that for many young women, their period stop and they become infertile after the HPV Vaccine, and I have heard stories of young men who were sexually active before getting the HPV Vaccine, but who became impotent afterwards.
... just food for thought. I have no proof. But it is strange that this is suddenly such a new things -- as you said most doctors have never even heard of it -- and that it is mostly occurring in young women.
Also, not being able to use a tampon as a 13-yr-old doesn't mean that you had this problem already. I couldn't use one either, so I always opted out of swimming etc at that time of the month. Not until after I became sexually active could I stand to insert a tampon.
It isn't 100% proof, I'll admit that. But it is a potential sign that there could be something wrong.