Writing about emotional addicts of my life made me think friendships I have in general. I don’t have too many friends, nor I feel like I need to have. Those relationships I have are important to me and I value these people extremely high.
So, being emotional rekt and all, how do I feel about friendships?
For me real meaningful friendship is like I would gave all the weapons needed to destroy me to somebody and then I blindly trust that they don’t use them against me. Pretty much same applies with other relationships too. There is a lot to choose from if you need to destroy me, so I’m not giving away those weapons easily.
There are only a few person walking the surface of the earth whom I trust all my weapons, or at least most of them. People who could easily fuck up my life if that is something they choose to do. But as said, I haven’t given these ammos away easily and surprise motherfuckers, these things come with trade also!
People whom has power to hurt me, are ones I have weapons against too. Whom I could as easily destroy, as they could do that to me. It might seem horrible, or just well knowledge fact, but that is what being friends is all about.
Having ability hurt someone and not using it.
We are terrible with this taking photos together-thing....
Terrifying thought?
Maybe. But in the same time it is also truth. This applies to all human2human relationships, only amount of ammos differs. It can be distressing or it can be funny, it depends how seriously you take your self basically. I have exceptional self knowledge and good self-esteem, and I won't take myself too seriously. I let my friends laugh on my expense and I don’t feel like this is a problem. We are aware of the fact that we have things against each other and we also have tendency to use those ammos rightfully. Just as a reminder if someone of us starts to forget. ;)
(less) conversations and rants and infernal amount shit and giggles. Sometimes at our own expense, sometimes each other, nevertheless not taking your self too seriously is big part of our friendship.Even if our humor is black as a night we don’t fuck up each others lives. Another skill needed when you have a lot material from your friends. You guys already know that @eveuncovered is my bff. And damn, do I have ammos against her! Amusement lies that we know what are the thing we should really keep safe from the world, and which thing are appropriate to make fun of. Our relationship is mix of deep meaningful
And even if we have tendency to fool around quite a bit we don't need to be together all the time or even talk to each other. For me this kind of relationships with people are the best kind. There is no neediness, no too much fuzz, and nobody gets butthurt if you just ask them to fuck off. That is something close to true love!
😘
grabs popcorn. this is getting more and more interesting. 😃
Damn, those moves! I could get anyone I choose to... Wonder why I'm single :D
Damn girl, you make love to the camera, violently:D
What can I say, the camera just looooves me!
Nice post, nice pictures, nice message.
I hate these people with 1000 friends that are... only on the surface.
I don't even know that many people... Seems like awful job to remember everyones names...
Oh I once had 600 Facebook „Friends“ 😐
Awful ... 🍷
I deleted all my friends 😂 free from chains of main stream social medias!
I did this once - to realize i‘m using Facebook connect on several sites 🙃 so i‘m bound forever.
What the fuck is wrong with you two? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Facial spasms? At least 😂
She looks like @steemed-open in first photo. Isnt she? @eveuncovered
I'm your friend because damn it would be scary to be your enemy!!
Good call, you are smart girl, always have been 😂
Great share, everyone good friendship I built had its ups and down, never perfect. But that what makes friends bffs! @escapist
Infernal amount of shit..
I can't say I'm surprised, but I'm still amazed about this. Women really do shit.
Hahah and GIGGLES!
I do the same thing! I giggle after a shit.
It's a magical moment, pretty much like giving birth.
Mazel tov!
Very good points Escapist.
Thanks. I’m pointy that way!
I have a model that I use to describe relationships. Imagine a stool with three legs. These legs are love, respect and trust. Each aspect has a characteristic pattern.
I think that you are describing the trust aspect of your relationships. If a person has been hurt enough in their relationships due to having their trust mishandled it becomes increasingly difficult to engage in new relationships and even maintain existing relationships.
You are somewhat right about that. But it all comes to how you define things. I don’t think you can have anything above without other. Love does not exist without trust and respect. For me at least.
You and I have a "relationship". It isn't a very big relationship. It is like sitting beside a stranger on a bus. You have a teeny tiny amount of "love" for me in the sense you don't necessarily want me to come to harm (although you did look up the price of chainsaws). If we were propinquitous and you found me amusing, and emotionally supportive the "love" would grow. It might not be an aspect of a magnificent relationship but it could be one where you could be tricked into walking my dog. On the other hand if after you have listened to a few of my jokes ... your willingness for affection (love) may diminish. It can drop below the level of not wanting harm to come to me and you actually start sharpening your knives. Love is that aspect that grows (or not). When I was young, I was very quick to "love". The neurochemicals in my brain would easily flood my neurons, tricking me into affection. I could move quickly from the baseline of "not wanting harm" to pure infatuation just by seeing the flush on a girl's cheek.
Respect is an emotion which can only be earned. On steem, a measure which deserves a level of respect is your reputation number. I compare my number 51 to your number 56 and recognise you really are much better than I am when it comes to social media. People genuinely must like you more than me. Of course I tend to write about uninteresting topics and not very well in the process.
Trust I wrote about before.
I agree that you have all three emotions toward a person. However the extent of each emotion can vary. I mentioned a stool with three legs. If you cut off a couple of centimeters (an inch) from one leg, the stool will remain standing. It levels itself off at a lower level of stability. Imagine that you had a great love for a successful businessperson who was emotionally supportive and cared only for you. Then imagine that his business went bankrupt and he was forced to live in his car. This would not change the amount of love that you would have but it would change your relationship especially if he lost his business because of gambling debts. In this case your emotions would adjust resulting in a smaller relationship. The same thing could happen if he lied to you. This would affect your level of trust. No matter how much a person promised never to lie (or cheat with another woman as an example) that level of trust never fully can be regained.
I agree. Excellent points you have there. Respect and trust are the ones that matter for me most with people. Love, it is too much about the neurochemicals fucking your brain and tricking you in affection even with minor reasons. Respect and trust are more logical.
And we can negotiate about dog walking. It depends on dog. And walk.
I was a little confused by our exchange so I thought to read a few more of your posts and I came across this one. In it I see that you are an INTP-A. Over the years I have taken both the Myers-Briggs and the Keirsey and was an INTJ. After taking the test that you gave a link to it recorded me as an INTP-T (although I had problem answering a number of questions). It is possible that I introduced a little bias in some of my answers.
A number of years ago I took a personality test on a major "Dating site". At the time there wasn't a single match on their platform (which I assume was international). Although I am convinced that there was a penguin in Antarctica who may have been a possibility.
A penguin is not a bad choice, they are always dressed up top fashion. And of course you are INTJ, I'm not surprised I have to say :) So did your readings make you more or less confused ?
To compound my problems, I was born in June ... making me a Gemini. While most people agree there is no evidence to support belief in astrology, I have a hypothesis that the level of hormones gives complicated reactions in the womb especially in the winter months when light levels affect melatonin. This may explain why Gemini have two minds...
So in other words, I am always confused ...
Kiitos. Tavoittelinkin jotain tällaista!
Ole hyvä :)
I find that the friendships I hold most dear are the ones I have with a few people with which I don't speak everyday and sadly don't see very often, but when we do speak or see each other it is as if no time has past and even then we can simply sit by the fire together in silence looking at the same stars. Strong friendships built with like minded, fun, caring and true people. People that attempt to screw with my chi gets told to fuck off quickly.
That indeed is true friendship. I cherish the silent moments, when we are so like minded that there is no need to say anything anymore.