The first thing that comes to my mind is the idea that there’s nothing WRONG with HAVING STANDARDS.
If you’re in a relationship with someone that doesn’t meet your standards, then you owe it to yourself, and to them, to move on.
In most marriage ceremonies around the world, there is a clause that states, “Until death do us part.”
But relationships are not only PHYSICAL. There are also EMOTIONAL and SPIRITUAL components.
When the emotional and spiritual part of the relationship has died, then THE RELATIONSHIP HAS DIED.
It’s time to move on.
I mean, why stay in a relationship “Until death” ...if you’re miserable together and unable to get along?
For example, if someone is lying to you, or cheating on you, or has too many sexual hang-ups, or bores you to tears, or disrespects you, or abuses you, etc. etc. etc…
…It’s time to move on, in my opinion.
So the first step is to decide whether or not your relationship is salvageable.
Once that part is taken care of, and you’ve decided that it’s time to go, the next step is to simply break up with that person from a position of non-judgment and respect.
This is the part that people tend to have the most trouble with, because deep down we don’t want to HURT the other person (even though that’s usually inevitable in most cases).
The thing is, when you stay in a relationship with somebody that no longer makes you happy, it HURTS THEM MUCH MORE.
How would YOU like to find out that your lover is only with you out of PITY?
Ouch.
They deserve to be set free so that they can move on with their life and find happiness elsewhere.
It took me a long time to brake up with my first boyfriend, we were a couple for six years, but after six months I wasn't happy anymore. But I thought it would hurt him too much if I broke up, even if he hurt me in many ways. In the end, a good book and my husband helped me to end this misery. My ex was hurt and for the first time in his live turned to drugs, but not because he lost someone he loved, but he lost someone he considered property, a trophy. I think he never really loved me, but used me right from the beginning. I had to end the relationship, or somewhen, I fear, I would have ended my life. No one is worth this.