You and me both. I may or may not wash my hands after.... #1 depending on timing and stuff like that but I'll never... #1 with dirty hands. I wash my hands before rather than after more often than not if that makes sense.
#2 though dude.. No. That's just wrong. Do it in front of me and I'll talk shit on the internet. = }
Yeah at least pretend for everyone else's sake lol