I was discussing addiction earlier and felt it would be a good idea to take some time and reflect on this topic as I haven't discussed it in what feels like a long time. To any of you that do not know, I struggled with addiction for most of my life and it's something I have to remind myself to pay attention to from time to time. Many people think of the physical aspects of addiction and that quitting using a substance or behavior is the hard part, but the truth I've found is that there is much more to it than that.
Addiction comes in many forms and wears many disguises. You can be an alcoholic, a sex addict, addicted to attention, or substance abuser. The truth is that no matter what label you want to put on it, we're all still people. People struggling to find their own way to peace and self love. It's a life long journey for all of us and while some people exhibit different symptoms and others are better at hiding the fact, at the core of the problem there is always a lack of self love and judgmental mindset. I'll share my personal perspective and hopefully help someone else.
I found that when I took away all of the substances, money, things, and other people that I wanted to use to make me feel whole, that it didn't make that hole or craving go away. I could switch from alcohol to cocaine to opiates or attention, but at the end of the day I still had to face the one person that I was running away from. I had to face myself and it was the only way to break the cycle permanently. I knew I was killing myself and hiding who I really was from people, but I didn't know why. The thing is when we are avoiding confronting our own internal issues and facing down our own egos that nothing or no one is ever going to be able to fill that hole.
I started asking questions and changing the questions to find the answers that I needed. "Why do I want to get high?" turned into "why do I want to stay sober?" "Why does everyone hate me?" turned into "Why do I feel like everyone hates me?" At the core of all of the questions and broken logic running circles in my head was a need for control. The serenity prayer has a lot of wisdom in it if we are willing to absorb it. Accept the things I cannot change and change the things I can. It turns out the only thing I can change is my own mind and I don't need to worry about other people or their opinions of me. Those that matter don't mind and those that mind don't matter. The key to breaking my own addiction was to fully accept that I am not in control of the world, but only of myself and my acceptance of that fact. I hope this helps someone. Namaste.
Free use image from Pixabay.
Well said.. I agree with most of what you shared. Though I've had a slightly different idea about addiction than most people.. I don't see addiction as bad. I think it's just important to try to be addicted to the right things! Like. What's wrong with being addicted to helping people? That seems like a good addiction to me! I think it's when our addictions start to hurt our lives that it becomes a problem.. And curiously enough, I never looked up the etymology of addiction before and I was a lil surprised to see what it said..
Nonetheless I think it kinda lines up with how I felt.. It depends on how you look at the addiction and how it's controlling or effecting your life.
"addiction (n.) Look up addiction at Dictionary.com
c. 1600, "tendency, inclination, penchant" (a less severe sense now obsolete); 1640s as "state of being (self)-addicted" to a habit, pursuit, etc., from Latin addictionem (nominative addictio) "an awarding, a delivering up," noun of action from past participle stem of addicere "to deliver, award; devote, consecrate, sacrifice" (see addict (v.)). In the sense "compulsion and need to take a drug as a result of prior use of it" from 1906, in reference to opium (there is an isolated instance from 1779 with reference to tobacco)."
HOWEVER.. The modern definition is not so umm.. Great.
"noun 1.the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma."
Though.. I still kinda feel the same way.. A few times in my life I've said something like.. You shouldn't be a slave to anything.. Except perhaps love.. So.. If you're slave to love and helping others.. I still think that's a pretty good addiction compared to other addictions that can really mess you up psychologically and physically.
I agree, addiction is different for everyone and who knows, maybe I just decided to get addicted to life. I do feel infinitely more at peace now though and I'm grateful for that every day. Thanks for the additional perspective!
Being addicted to life sounds like a good addiction as well! Who could fault someone for being addicted to life?
Glad to hear that you feel more at peace and that you're grateful every day. That's awesome man! And you're welcome. I'm happy to interact more now that I have some free time!
In my opinion what you call good addiction is interest or hobby - genery things I just like to do. Definicion of addiction for me is behavior that you have not under control and no matter what you do if you are not in control it will hurt you (at least in the long term). I have seen people getting completely wasted by helping others ... pretty much sacrificing themself ... in my opinion that is far from good.
Thank you for sharing your experience with addiction. You got a lot of response so definitely, you did touch some people.
That is a great article , with strong realistic advice. I am currently going through a break up and the mantra of accepting what I can and cannot change will help me through. Thank you
Best of luck @stickchumpion. <3
Everyone is addicted to something. Now if it’s a “good” addiction or a “bad” one that is another story. Most people just don’t like to admit they have an addiction like one to Steemit!
Glad you were able to address issues you have had in the past. Found a way to work them out and get better-- Stay strong.
I wish they would have carved the actual serenity prayer on the rock. They went through all that trouble of carving...
You are correct that addictions are attempts to fill a hole in our selves. And finding that hole can be very difficult, because this world, and especially your life, has made you blind to the damage. Then healing that wound is even more difficult because most of today's 'advice' is akin to, pour salt in the wound.
One of the weirdest addictions is the addiction to not being addicted.
Like someone who cannot drink because they cannot lose control. And so, in our world of vices and addictions everywhere, they look like they have it in control... but they do not.
Great perspective, it's hard to explain to people that the substance or object of our obsession isn't the problem.
I love that perspective. I have faced addictions, and to be honest still struggle at times. Your words did indeed help someone... me! Thank you for sharing!
:) I'm glad to hear that! You're welcome and thanks for reading!
I was talking with a friend today about addiction; he admitted that he still liked the drug that had haunted him, but that it was too expensive, in that it cost everything else in the world to get high on it.
I'd say that's a pretty accurate price of living with addiction. Hopefully everyone finds their way out of that hole.
I still have a homework to reverse my own question. but this statement below clearly sums it up. Saying it will always be easier and putting it into an actual action, is another problem. I'd have to go through a learning curve to finally understand to stop changing things I can't. Instead, lift up my sleeves and change things that has variable control.
This is important. It's still necessary to listen people who has constructive criticism instead the one who just criticizing with a lost cause. However, just sometime people has their own way to get through us with their judgment and opinion. Another thing to be learned :)
someday, over the rainbow I hopefully can make peace with the past, with my problems, with myself and be more at peace :) just like you're
Have a great day, talk to you soon !
Just know that it's possible and half the battle is won. You can build off of that knowing. Thanks for reading and I always wish you the best! :)
You're a wise one, @clayboyn and I'm so glad you've found peace and self-love; you deserve it. I realize I don't really "know" you, but I feel like you are a friend.
Thanks, I try to great everyone as a friend now! Sometimes my friends don't feel the same way and that's fine, we all have our own paths to walk. :)
Your article is really indeed informative
Thanks, just trying to help others. :)
@clayboyn this post needs meditation which is second study. The key to breaking my own addiction was to fully accept that I am not in control of the world, but only of myself and my acceptance of that fact.
My last post talk about Mr Perfect where I let the world know that no one is perfect but you can make yourself perfect by making use of what's surrounds you. You are not in control of this planet but you can make the planet to be controlled by you, by simply using what surrounds you and get your results.
Nice post buddy.
I appreciate you putting this out there... I am the son of an absent father who till this day struggles with his addiction, he has been in and out of rehab for as long as I can remember with plenty of those times being situations we thought he would not live through them... As someone who loves his father as flawed as he might be I would like for society to eventually shift the narrative on addiction and treat it for it what really is... its a mental health problem not a criminal one... sometimes I think that the stigma behind addiction is one of the elements that does not allow for recovering addicts to dig themselves out that emotional trench.... Anyways enough rambling from me.. thanks for sharing.
That's a tough situation, and I agree completely. Many aspects of healing are treated externally when the real healing has to take place in our own minds. I wish you both the best.