I have heard many times over the course of my life people say that the greatest illusions are the ones we tell ourselves. I spent over half of my life caught up with conspiracy theories and trying to expose things that government and mega corporations were out there hiding and I remember the day that it hit me that I was done. The day I found out about Seth Rich, which I want to say was between August and November of 2016, I was spiraling so far out of control and I had to face the facts. It wasn't making me happy no matter how far down the rabbit hole I was diving and it wasn't making anyone else happy trying to rip the veil of illusion down from in front of their faces. I had to start looking into my own life and realizing why after spending most of my life trying to expose the worlds problem I still felt like I had never accomplished anything and I was unhappy.
The truth that I have found is that we all have so much net impact on the world and how we choose to use that influence determines our own happiness. Think about it like this, positive and negative energy exists on a flat absorbent material like a paper towel split in half. One side is positive and the other side is negative. I want to have a positive impact on the world and I don't know how to do it, so I start doing the one thing I know I am great at and start hunting down lies and deception. I know I am good at it and I'm spreading the word about shit people will be finding out about 8 months to a year down the road. In my mind I'm pouring my positive energy into that negative side and hoping some of it is absorbed across that line and results in some positive output. The results aren't what I'm expecting and I'm still living in a world of deceit and illusion.
The day that I had to face that fact and I realized that my life had meant absolutely nothing up until that point was devastating. What did I have if I didn't have the ability to be what in my mind was a good person? The conclusion that I came to was that I was falling for the illusion myself. I believed that hunting down liars and deceptions through my own lies and deceptions was somehow going to fix the world. I mean, I was pretty good at lying and deception, don't get me wrong, but one amazing source of subterfuge is not going to counteract all of the other deceptions in the world. I also had to consider that I wasn't making anyone happy by telling them that things are actually worse than they perceived them to be.
What happens if I take my energy and move it to the other side of that line and start pouring it into the positive side? At worst, I have some of my energy cross over into the negative side of the field, but the majority of it is still going where I want it to go. It made me rethink everything and stop lying to myself. Negativity used to combat negativity is never going to have as much of a positive impact as spreading pure positive energy. I can't convince anyone of that and no I don't agree with or condone violence, deception, pizzagate, rape, or murder. I can still see that all of those things exist, but I won't fight back on their own terms, because it will never have the end result that I want. Spread positivity, don't attack negativity, and have faith that people learn from positive example just as easily as they embrace and adopt fear based existence from negative examples. Namaste.
Since I started actively posting 2 weeks ago, I have been having a crisis of self. Up until the day I started on steemit, I was a conspiracy investigator. Listening to pundits, chasing the days news, getting ahead of everyone else while getting nowhere.
I allowed massive bull markets to pass me by because collapse was around the corner. It's still around the corner but I'm done playing the smart prepper. I'm going to take part in this crypto coin boon and play a part in society.
Nobody cares that your government wants you dead, or at least impaired. Guess what? I don't care anymore either.
I'm quitting the conspiracy world. I already know how evil the powers that be are. They are evil. Seth Rich's murder investigation, or lack there of, is all you really need to see.
It's time to live life.
Exactly. Chasing their demons is just another way for them to win, because we are wasting our lives trying to be like them to beat them instead of approaching it from the other direction.
Super well said.
massive government corruption .but now we have internet and people are waking up to the lies when everyones woken up and ready we go kick there arses and them scum bankers .i no what your saying tho dont get to caught in the web
It's all about the banks....
People are easily swayed to negativity, just look at the 'programming' from the 'news'. Conditioned to it we are. And you are right @clayboyn, people will learn by experiencing positive examples. Our world needs lots more folks doing positive acts, leading by example.
"Avoid throwing bricks at a crumbling building, save the bricks to build a new structure based on a positive dynamic".- Tio Andy, Cherokee Medicine Man.
@bilbop always dropping some knowledge. <3
Thanks @clayboyn Seem as though we are on the synchronous positivity frequency :-)
And steeming on.
right on
Indeed and in deed, thanks @battleaxe
Love this piece. Have come across a few individuals in my life like this who were conspiracy theorists , and i honestly try to avoid any conversations other than simple pleasantries like hello, how are. How would you suggest i allow myself to respond to someone like this without feeling the weight of negativity and just wanting to run away?
Honestly, I would just say do what makes you happy and if talking to them doesn't make you happy, then don't. I had to cut a lot of ties personally, but it was worth it.
Don't focus on attacking the individual or individuals in their lie. All you need to do is expose it for what it is and then like the wise Goldbloom says:
He also says, "Change your apartment, change the world."
I am going through a similar process. I was waiting and waiting for really bad things to happen so that I could prove I knew what was up. It was making me miserable. Since I have moved on I have enjoyed my life as it is a lot more. Great post. Thanks for sharing.
Excellent post @clayboyn. Thank you for sharing your process of growth, acceptance and conscious use of your personal power with us.
My life experience has also taught me to stay centered in love to most effectively maintain my creative abilities. In doing so, I am better able to harness my will instead of allowing it to be hijacked by any person(s), place(s) or things.
Thank you as always! Namaste
:) Thanks. Controlling and accepting responsibility for our own energetic presence is the first step to having the impact we desire. Namaste.
Yessss..... :)
Namaste
I think it's just a matter of doing on what you can do and feeling positive about it. The problem with digging too deep for truth and meaning in the corrupt nonsense is that it usually goes hand in hand with being alarmist and negative, which only really adds to the problem. I do appreciate people out searching for truth but I hope they can find peace in the good things they are doing, rather than dwell in the negativity of that which they are trying to expose.
Some shit doesn't have a positive side. Pizza and murder are hard to justify.
I don't mean feeling positive about what's going on, I mean feeling positive about what you are doing about it. If you can't feel positive about your efforts to expose crap and at peace with the universe, you probably have another calling ;-)
I get it, and unfortunately from what I've seen, you clear out one shit factory and another one opens down the street.
hahahaha are the shit factories making the conspiracy theories or the conspiracies? Do you no longer believe any of that stuff is happening or do you just think it's not worth focusing your energy on?
Net impact. I'm not blind, I just stopped having selective vision.
Nowadays I'll still drop some truth, but if I can see it's not being accepted, I'll plant a seed in hopes that it takes root and move on. But yeah, focusing on creating something positive is usually energy spent better than fighting the negative.
It certainly seems to make me happier focusing on the positive approach. Thanks for sharing!
Agreed!!
Most sheep love the lies, so I don't waste my time on them anymore.
I've come to this conclusion, "nothing is as it seems."
And I'm happy knowing that I'm prepared, come hell or high water.
Congratulations @clayboyn and Steem on !!
@clayboyn THANK You Very much 4 this post... I'm guilty of the same thinking and doing my best to change my perspective to focus on the Positive !!
UpVoted, Following from almost my very 1st day
Have a Great Weekend !!
:) We all have our own paths, I just chose to change the one that I was on.
@clayboyn Just ReSteemed... I believe our thoughts are Much More powerful than most of us will ever realize or fully understand... Thanks Again !!
Resonates with me, upvoted and followed!
Come and invite the Holy Spirit in your life. Let His truth guide you to shine light upon your neighbours. Never stop fighting for truth.
so ive got a question for you.... obviously youve been down some rabbit holes and you know some shit so let me ask you what the right thing to do is....
if you are having a conversation with a person and they repeatedly use a word or something incorrectly in a way that may not be obvious to everybody but is undeniably, categorically incorrect....
what is the right thing to do, correct them- or not?
what if all of your friends are jumping off a bridge or a cliff? do you?
im not judging im actually with you most ofthe way but bottom line for me is there truly is a spiritual war taking place (im not religious) and i cant unlearn the things ive learned.
As such, I now refrain from sharing my opinion where it wont be cared for butstill care to understand what is really going on. idk
I'll answer it the best way I know how. Right and wrong will both always exist. If you whiped out every evil you could find, you would still be finding more evil. One does not exist without the other because they are in essence the same thing from different perspectives. You have to know what you believe to be right and accept that you knowing it is right can't make someone else not know that it is wrong. Hopefully that makes sense.
yeh grey jedi duality type shit i feel u bru.
okay so fucking/murdering babies and joking about it might not be wrong? or is it more about the fact so long as you push with good you will create a reality of bad or light/dark or however one wants to word it?
because the satanic shit obviously already exists so is it more about accepting the reality of the world and moving on?
Since you brought up the Jedi, one of my favorite philosophical references, think about the difference between them and the Sith. Sith want to destroy and eradicate while Jedi search for balance. Do you want to destroy or find balance?
see i love star wars and grew upwatching them literally every day. i would choose jedi every time but unfortunately in that realm the grey jedi are the path of balance and the jedi somehow are a chicken/egg relationship with the sith. and only by not interfering can balance be achieved....
but if we exist in a reality where the fuckery takes place, can we really achieve balance by sitting idly by?
i only argue so hard because im pretty sure taking your approach is where im gonna end up lol
:) It's not an argument, we are all trying to find our own understanding. You are right that there are Jedi, which are aligned more to one side which is how I view people hunting and exposing people that they feel are doing wrong. The point is though, if you listen to every time they talk about the force, they are searching for balance. All of those "green" Jedi are just the opposite of "red" Sith. The Grey in the middle is the closest thing to peace that will ever exist in that galaxy far far away. Maybe "peace" only exists in our reality by realizing that both sides are still being destructive towards the other and only when they both stop does peace and harmony exist.
howdo we get to that point without the truth of things, whatever that may be, coming to light?
Beautifully written, @clayboyn. It's a Hindu concept and i'm paraphrasing but the entire world / universe exists within our minds. We create the life we wish to lead.
I resonate with that. Thanks for sharing!
"No amount of darkness can fight darkness, but it takes only a small light to chase darkness away".
Applowed, upvoted and resteemed.
Thanks for the support!
Good read, for some it may apply: "Ignorance is bliss." If well-being is at stake then it's time to stop and examine oneself. I admire your advocacy for positivity to lead a better life. You can still help others in so many ways. Kudos!
Attacking the negativity doesnt change
Leave them as it be.. Then they will realise soon
Agree..
I find this post to be of great wisdom (y)
Great post! It's always a good idea to remain positive and spread positivity! :)
I concur, and I'm much happier now than I ever was approaching things from the other way.
Great post and great advice @clayborn. Have come to that conclusion myself after a similar realisation. Be the change you wish to see in the world so they say.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts buddy!
Gandhi knew what was up.
In reference to your most recent post which I have just read, I hear what you are saying! :)
I look forward to seeing what else you have to say my friend.
Thank you for sharing your insight into our human condition! :)
Imma Theoretical Conspiracist myself.
:) as long as it makes you happy, do it!
Congrats on your epiphany.
As the old saying goes,"You can lead a horse to water..."
People will only see the things they're able to handle and many in this world can't handle how much they've been deceived.
Live your life and try to improve the lives of others around you.
That's all we can do.
Thanks for the support!
It's all fun and games until you find out "Men in Black" is based on a true story...
Spreading positivity is the answer! Amazing how similar this all sounds brother, and that ain't no damn coincidence.
Being negative didn't get me very far lol.
LOL, yeah, it does that.
There is a lot to think about here… thank you…
Why not do both?
It doesn't make me happy and if I'm not happy I will never be a strong positive influence on anyone.
You can't do both.
I can do both.
More power to you.
(y)
I don't think it's possible to stop being a 'conspiracy theorist' once you are awake to the layers of deception that lie before you. Sure, you can choose not to actively investigate your suspicions, but suppressing them entirely will be quite the task. Once the cat is out the bag, there's not putting it back in- as they say.
I can understand your difficulty in maintaining a level of comfort, especially when looking into the darkest aspects of human existence. But, perhaps changing your direction entirely is not necessary.
You are correct when you say that we only have so much impact that we can make on the world alone. I feel that your problem, and one that I have had myself in the past, is that you are putting too much of the world's problems on your own shoulders.
Many of us have answered that same calling. It can seem as though it is our very purpose to 'awaken' everyone on Earth to the reality of their bondage. But, we soon find that it's not so easy for others to accept the truth, and the task is far more difficult than we had imagined.
This doesn't mean that you should give up. It is good to be well informed, for then you possess the power to better inform those who have been misled. I can't save the fucking world though, and most likely, neither can you. But, maybe that's not our job. Maybe your job is to wake up the person who will go on to wake up the one who will inevitably wake us all up. Perhaps my purpose is to convince you not to stop what you're doing, simply so that you are still able to complete your own.
I don't fucking know. I never will. But, I do know that if we all decide we've had enough of the truth, the world we will wake up in tomorrow will make this one look like heaven.
I think you should keep doing what you are doing. There is a reason you felt so compelled to do it in the first place. because it's something that has to be done.
And one last thing;
I too have spent much time reflecting, wondering whether I am the 'good guy' that I convince myself I am. In the end, I found it to be somewhat redundant.
Who we are is fleeting. You will never again be the person you are in this exact moment, so don't punish yourself for that person's sins.
I think the very fact that you're spending time self-reflecting and attempting to ascertain whether you really are a good man, that in itself is evidence that you are the person you need to be. A person who wants to be more tomorrow than they were today, and who is considerate enough to challenge their own decisions to ensure their heart is in the right place.
I don't think you can ask for anything more than that from any human being. Don't be too hard on yourself, mate.
This post is just what I needed to hear thank you! 5 min of meditation and the Wim Hoff breathing technique definitely improves positivity.
At no point did I say I didn't pay attention to it or acknowledge it, I just don't devote my personal energy to infiltration and subterfuge anymore. Assuming why I chose the path I did beyond anything I said in the post is a prime example of why I stopped associating with people that live in a world of deceit and illusion. Cultish ideology of positive thinking versus cultish ideology of feeling like it's my job to go around and play in the mud to prove to the world that dirt exists is just egotistical and deluded. Feel self important if you want to or feel however you want to about my decision, but assuming you have any idea why I couldn't do it anymore is for you to make peace with. I love how this is the reaction that I got from pretty much anyone that knew me before too.
The greatest illusion is that truth isn't perspective based or that I give a fuck about your illusions of whatever the fuck your self righteous fuckery is trying to get across right now. Step out of your ego and perhaps we can have an actual conversation :)
You see your ego is that thing making you ignore what I've already said. "Feelings" are what you have that make you want to prove you are right and I am wrong. Zero fucks are what I'm giving. Have a great day! Namaste.