I'd say we're very quick to second-guess ourselves and very prone to self-doubt, so that's why we feel attacked unnecessarily.
As you say, we're not sure of ourselves and painfully aware of our inner doubts, so naturally, when someone addresses the general topic of that doubt, we get the feeling that they too know what's in our heads.
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Indeed, I think it is perhaps better to catch that emotional thought first and inspect it before going on a rampage. Nothing worse than finding out you are wrong twice about the same thing :)