Hi gang! I'm posting second time today hurayyy (*＾▽＾)／ so proud of myself ! ( because I'm a lazy potato in general) .
I wanted to talk about confidence and how I achieved it through modelling. When I was growing up , I was a very large girl and was constantly bullied by girls in school because I was :
- Overweight
- Extremely Shy
- Foreign (meaning my understanding of certain aspects of the culture was different)
- Extremely Insecure
- Anxious
All of these things made me stressed out which resulted in more eating and more things to be unhappy about. I would eat two pizzas for breakfast and constantly eat chocolate bars and sweets. It was scary how much I could put in my body and my size only kept growing and growing until the age of 14 when I was coming to a UK size 16-18.
(photo by Sean Conroy)
I realized that its time to change my habits and went on an extreme diet where I would eat very little a day and completely give up sweets and salty foods that I used to love before (them damn crisps yummm ). It was at around when I was 16 that I was asked by a photographer to model for the first time. My makeup was done, my hair and my clothes were styled, I felt like a princess.
(photo by Andy Parnell)
I wanted to be pampered more and wanted more nice pictures of myself where I looked slim and pretty.
(photo by Darren Moriarty)
(photo by Colm Edwards)
A lot of my photoshoots I would start to style my own clothes and do my own make up and hair meaning that I wouldn't be dependent on other creatives and free to do my photoshoots.
(photo by Brian Hutchinson)
Eventually when I was 18 it got to a point that I could see my ribs and my parents were worried about my health. I felt amazing but I didn't have a feminine body and my bones hurt me because my clothes would rub off them. When other girls were curvy , I felt like a boy because I had barely any meat on me.
(photo by Andrea Guetti )
When I met my boyfriend I was starting to slightly gain weight and we started getting more take out and eat more junk food. I started gaining weight, and after I got a job in an office with free snacks my whole diet went downhill.
(photo by @condra )
(photo by @condra)
It really cut down on my confidence and I stopped doing photoshoots because I didn't feel like I was the right person to do it anymore. I felt "fat" again even though I had a normal body weight. I would dress up in really baggy clothes and I even cut my hair to try and change something about myself but none of that helped and made me feel worse.
(photo by @condra)
I got extensions and I started thinking a bit more positively and finally my confidence is coming back. I want to completely update my portfolio with my new body and be comfortable with my size and myself in general. Its absolutely important to always remember that all the photos we see online and in magazines are generally photo-shopped and people look much more normal in real life ( like myself （‐＾▽＾‐） ) . We all get old and lose our youthfulness but the beauty within will always shine ~ ~ ~ remember that girls the next time you feel bad for not looking a certain way °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°
If you wonder what I look like now, this is my most recent photoshoot which was about two months ago （⌒▽⌒ゞ I have a photoshoot scheduled for sometime this month so I will be posting it later on here.
Have a good day ya'll! ೭੧(❛▿❛✿)੭೨
(photo by Kevin Collins )
(photo by Kevin Collins)
love your content and your pictures.
Great work! Keep it going :)
Thank you very much !!! o(>///<)o
We all feel fat, some days more than others!
Having confidence in your body is really important for self-esteem, and photoshopped models do a lot to undermine it. Its important to remember its manipulated though - they don't wake up like that!
Keep keepin' it real!
I completely agree, everything is so fake these days and I wish more people knew that o(*≧□≦)o
Lovely photos, thanks for sharing.
Thank you o(^▽^)o
Sorry to hear about the bullying when you where younger. Glad to see you made such a success of your life.
I guess all our experiences growing up eventually make us into the people we are today.
Your photo's are absolutely stunning, keep em coming.
Thank you so much o(>ω<)o
Aww nice
Thank you Ｏ(≧▽≦)Ｏ
Thanks for the shout out and congrats on your epic wins on Steemit. You're passing me out and I've been on this a year! Really lucky to have a friend like you.
It's all thanks to all your help @condra , you're awesome and I'm lucky to have a bestie like yourself ^.^ besides I'm always lucky at first but then it all goes to shitz >.<
Great job overcoming its never an easy endeavor but extremly rewarding when you make it to the otherside. Your a very beautiful woman they should all be eating their hearts out now. Thanks for sharing your story. Enjoy your shoot.
Thank you so much for your kind words and for reading my story !!! >///<
My pleasure, I always enjoy hearing one persevere on :) . I just posted a blog with some street art, you might like the portrait of a girl someone did. If you get a chance: LINK Steem on and have a great day.
Love seeing such positivity 😊
Nice photos @eriluks! Very beautiful
Thank you o(^∀^*)o
Turning ones life around can be difficult. Keep up the great work! Happy Steemin!!😃
Thank you !! ^.^
lovely pics @eriluks, thanks for sharing your story!
Thank you for taking your time to read it !!! ^.^
Good luck in here. I am sure you'll do well!
Thank you ! ^^
😘😘😘😘😘😘Your pic very amazing these pic remember me my ex girlfriend 😘😘😘😘😘😘
You are defiantly in the right place. Steemit is such a good environment, love your work. Steem on!
That's a great story Erika, thank you for sharing! I also read your other posts and saw that you love Japan! I also love Japanese culture and it's my goal to backpack over there hopefully sometime next year.
Anyways, I love how you grew to be confident through out all those obstacles. I learned that when life knocks you down, you can either choose to be bitter, or be better. Obviously you took the latter route :). It was awesome to read your story, can't wait to read more.
Also, I have a little fun anime contest going on right now. If you have the time and want to have a chance to win some free SBDs, please check it out :)!
https://steemit.com/anime/@gthongo/the-top-10-anime-of-all-time-contest
You are beautiful in your own body, there is nothing wrong with it. I also wrote a blog few days ago with the similar thoughts about beauty. If you have time.. you can check my blog here.. https://steemit.com/philippines/@monkeypattycake/body-positive-i-m-sexy-and-i-know-it-and-the-price-of-beauty it’s about body positivity. I hope it can help you and others. I also followed you and I will make time to read your stories. 😉
lovely ^^
thank you for sharing