"The only thing scarier than not being understood is being understood" might be a cute play on Wilde's quote, and it might be in bad taste to quote myself, but I've found this to be so true.
When I comment on people's poetry and they tell me I see right to their core, I shuffle my feet. It's not just the uncomfortable position of being praised, or even knowing I hold tools to hurt another, but knowing it is also an accusation.
So it is scary to reveal yourself. We live life, and while we're constantly told that sharing of ourselves is fine and lauded, what we're shown is that we'll be punished. We'll be hurt. So hurt, for doing so.
And there's a difference between letting people read between the lines, cocooned in plausible deniability, and stating it for all to see. One is much more open. Much more fraught. Like when I wrote of my depression.
As for the crutches - that is how we learn to walk. The only question is whether we're eventually willing to abandon them. I suspect you'll rely on crutches a bit more during this challenge, because editing is how we sometimes take them off, and because of the time pressure. The question is whether you'll rely on them less than you had before by the time this journey ends.
And again, I'd be glad to help you edit.