It seems to be a kind of economic thinking, doesn't it? What causes me to lose more?
Where evolutionary survival was concerned, such as "Am I approaching the buffalo and perhaps losing my life in the process? Or do I try this unknown fruit and possibly get stomach cramps?", today's considerations are far less life-threatening. ... But what does one know?
A self-questioning would probably be good, instead of giving the sole power over us in the answer of the other.
Instead of considering the situation according to its cost, Natan could ask himself first: What do I win? And: Are there two possible answers for me, "yes" or "no"? The answer would be: I gain an experience. In any case, there would also be a win on the other side, that of the woman: Also an experience.
If I am of the opinion that both can only win, she and I, then there is nothing threatening about a question anymore and I dare my luck.
As a friend of mine said, the fears of modern people are luxury fears. I would even say they are evasive fears. You just have a lot of (thinking)time to get scared. Just as there are high specializations in the professions, there are also more and more subcategories and new diagnoses in the phobias :-)
Erika! 😃 Nice to see you around :)
I like the question 'What do I win?' very much. It provides an entire different perspective to the outcome. And, in the end, I believe it was this sort of thinking that pushed him to make the decision to go and talk to her.
I was worried about how he would react in case Emma rejected him. But, despite feeling pretty bue for a couple of days, he dusted himself off and accepted the whole experience as a step towards getting to know himself better.
It is incredible how just deciding to look at something from a positive or negative angle changes how we feel not only about ourselves, but about an entire event.
You take care.
Much love to you always :*
Thank you! :) Encouragement is the best we can do for each other.
We all need support from the people we deal with and helping friends to take up courage is always good. Perspective changing I find myself difficult when I deal with a difficult situation and I am so glad that I got people who help me finding other perspectives I myself wouldn't have come up with.
I send you my love, too!