Happy June.
The following is some advice to myself that I thought others here might find useful.
Surrender and stop trying to control things you cannot change. Some of these things may be extremely painful. You can choose to face them in constructive ways, or, if ultimately the issue is a toxic and irremediable force in your life, to cut ties, and move on. This isn't an easy choice to make, but ultimately, deep down inside, you know which battles are worth fighting, and who is worth fighting for. And, who is worth saying goodbye to.
It seems that the ones that we feel hurt most by are our loved ones. When stress compounds, especially if somebody already has existing emotional wounds from the past, or anger problems, it can be extremely challenging not to be "triggered" when they act out. Why? Because it really hurts, and feels like you are being blamed when ultimately it is their own wound from the past that is speaking out and projecting. One projection triggers another projection which snowballs into a giant mess.
Nobody is perfect. We all make mistakes and say hurtful things at times. We have to make the choice to communicate. No feeling is invalid. What is invalid is justifying hurting others because of our own emotional wounds.
The state is already trying to tear us all apart, and pit us against one another. Though it be challenging, I wish you all peace in your relationships this week, and wish to say, before you get triggered and lose your cool, acknowledge your feelings of anger, hurt, and sadness. Acknowledge the pain the other is feeling which is prompting them to act out, acknowledge that this acting out is also triggering you to act out, and then proceed in compassion and love. Not only for the other party, but also for yourself.
~*~
~KafkA
Graham Smith is a Voluntaryist activist, creator, and peaceful parent residing in Niigata City, Japan. Graham runs the "Voluntary Japan" online initiative with a presence here on Steem, as well as Facebook and Twitter. (Hit me up so I can stop talking about myself in the third person!)
Nice follow and upvoted
for both parties
Indeed.
nice...u deserve resteem and upvote...
Beautiful thoughts... Stress is a ***** :/
Happy Thursday!
In my stressful teacher’s life I practice something like time travel technique, projecting the situation, I cannot cope with, into the future or past till you feel your lips smiling, to conquer you can go further up to laughing ))) even now while reading you can see the point... yours now is in my list)))thanks
Yessir! It's really important that we take care of each other. So much more to gain from loving one another rather than tearing each other down.
Great post. Thought leads to emotions. Emotions lead to action. So CHOOSE what you think.
Absolutely.
Super relatable. Always thinking about this. My father told me growing up I could forever count on everything to change. It's the truth.
Happy June to you too. Very useful advice. Yes communication is key to sustain emotional relationship. Thanks Upvoted.
I hope this isn't about me. Did I trigger you? :)
I hope you'll revisit my last post that you commented on but chose not to support. I wrote a long explanation of how I think you're confused about what Marxism is and where I'm coming from. If I'm mistaken then I'd like to learn about it so I might correct my ways.
Re-find the refined wu wei zen...
No, no triggering from that post. Ha. I just responded as well.
awesome... :))
Definetly following you! Let go of the past and make way for the new! Hope u follow me too!
Wise words here, thank you. You're right it's better to let go of what we can't control. And then live our individual lives in the very best way possible.
Thanks for the post :) I think we already know these things deep down, but often we forget them. It's great to be reminded from time to time!
Yes Graham, You have found the most effective way of managing your challenges. But don't they assist so well with our inner growth and development ?
Well put! Please read my first post about love. I believe you may find it interesting.
:)