This was a fascinating read and for you to have so much insight into your own BPD is awesome. Parenting has such an impact on your personality as an adult and we instantly look to adults for unconditional love and to seek approval. My mother had mental health issues when I was younger and was quite a selfish parent. We were often rejected in favour of alcohol and adult fun. I am still extremely hurt now by rejection but have learned to control my emotioms on the whole just by having insight into my own state of mind.... its a powerful tool having personal insight..... love yourself so that others can love you too.
Am following you. Found your blog fascinating.... I'm a new fan xxx