There are certain moments in life when we feel we are frustrated enough and believe cheating is the right way, there are moments when we feel we have a genuine reason to cheat, moments we feel we might not get caught, but if we understand what cheating actually does, we won't want to cheat.
Cheats need to realize that random or external sexual partners are considered based on facial or external structures, it is hardly ever about love or character.
This write up is targeted at the males and females.
The men
Men who cheat are scum no matter their excuse. Cheating brings no joy, you get totally shrouded in secrecy, you become guilt ridden and that is just a tip of the iceberg. If you are in a relationship or married to a bad person, even if the person is also a cheat, there are two options...
You either walk away or talk your way.
There is simply no excuse, if you love your partner enough not to walk away, then you should love the person enough not to cheat. Cheating is not tied to a single gender and any man who uses the "men were not created to be with one woman phrase" as a defense is a fool. I am also a man so I know I am being fair.
The truth about cheating men is that most times, they can't even stand the thought of another man or woman on top their wives, yet they don't care when they cheat. The next time you as a married man is about to zip down and get busy with another female, picture your partner giving another man the reverse cowgirl.
If you think you are unmarried so that gives you the right to cheat as a man, then you are grossly mistaken. What if your sisters were being cheated on the way you cheat on other people's sisters, will that put a smile on your face?
Life is give and take and you are simply not excused. The truth with cheats is they need to realize it's just their hormones talking, the minute you are done, your problems arise because at that point, your eyes will become clear.
Some men call their sexual partners their bitches and they feel proud at the number they have, do you know that after one partner, any subsequent addition is a ticket to either poverty, misery or death. They fail to realize that they will feel fly until they drop dead like flies.
A woman can make a man who is a millionaire into a billionaire and a man who is a billionaire into a millionaire.
Men need to understand that women are smarter than we give them credit for, although they are prone to emotional bias, but truth be told, we are also prone to such, just that pride won't let men admit to being sissies. You think the extra lady will simply want to be a free meat? Think again, you just signed off your marriage or relationship into the realm of break ups.
The women
The most funny thing I have ever heard from a cheating woman is saying they keep multiple partners so they don't get disappointed. The proper way they say it is not keeping all their eggs in one basket.
Let me disappoint you, you have four boyfriends and you have to please all of them equally, you tell four men you love them and you convince yourself you love all four, the truth is you lack discipline.
Let me point out the flaws in that so called genius idea, what if one of them has a disease, congratulations you just infected the remaining three. Let us assume one is faithful to you, you just earned a degree as the world's worst asshole, because no matter how you try to spin it, you are a cheat who is keeping three extra boyfriends aside the faithful partner.
That means you are exactly what you fear, how ironic is life? Those who hate cheating and don't want to "lose" as a result of being cheated upon, now cheat on the innocent ones who truly loved them and lose it all.
How ironic is it when all four eventually disappoint you? Look at the bottle half full not half empty.
If in your case you cheat not to be cheated upon, then realize that you are what you are fighting and that is hypocrisy. Just imagine you now meet the person you think is the one only for you to discover you are just another tally number, how will that make you feel? Love and relationships are not for the feint of heart.
Cheating will put you in a position where you might actually fall for the wrong person, be used for fun and lose the right person. As adventurous as having multiple sex partners can be (because it's not right), realize that you are the rust in the metal.
If all men are cheats, I have one question, aside the gays, who do the men cheat with if not other women? One man cheats with several women who feel they are taking out insurance by dating several men and we wonder why we are losing the war on diseases.
General conclusion
Make your partner into your dream or fantasy. If you are married, remember what brought you two together in the first place. The myth about why males were not created to be monogamous is false, it doesn't explain why there are couples who grow old together without a single incidence of infidelity.
Your partner's size or looks should not discourage you, if the person is old, remember that the younger version chose you to spend an eternity with. A person who offers you love doesn't deserve disrespect in return.
If your partner ain't doing you right (in all aspects) try to talk about it.
Remember the bro and sis code, always think about how your fellow sisters will feel when you are sleeping with their man and think about how you will feel too. Same also, think about how your brothers will feel when you are sleeping about with their woman. If you got a partner and you look outside, you are scum.
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Wow. Words of wisdom
Thanks for sharing @ehiboss
Way to go @ehiboss, I suddenly feel womanish and proud of myself all at once.
And yes, what you had to say to the women was also on point. But then, you do realise that nothing, both said and done, can deter some people from cheating.
lol its funny how, the term cheating is now a normal thing, chrisbrown even said this ho** aint loyal. it applies for we the guys too.
Nice one bro
Cheating helps no one and would never make a person in a relationship feel any better but rather you may end up hating yourself for your act and thus end up with a wounded conscience. So its best to just talk things through with your partner. Let him or her know what you expect from them in the relationship, your likes, preferences and dislikes. That way you put the ball in your partner's court. And if he or she still continues to stray off course and you feel you can't continue to fight for the relationship, then it's best you just walk away from it. And then you can find the happiness you so desire in someone else. That way everyone wins.
But people feel it actually helps which is wrong. To cheat is like to condemn yourself to death
This POV coming from a man, talk less of a black man is so commendable. We live IN a world regarded as the 'man's', where they get away with everything and cheating is one of the things they pride themselves in. Cheating from both sexes is ugly and should be condemned in its totality.
Cheating is cheating...and at any form I would frown at it...
Reasons come up why people cheat, depends on who we are and how understandabke and logical we are.
So people are strong enough to forgive while some will never, it all depends on all that have been put into the relationship and why the saga came up and the circumstances behind the sage.
💦💦💦💦
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People need to get that cheating is actually cheating no matter the excuse.
I cant just read this wonderful post without dropping a comment. Relationship is love with understanding. Cheating comes when you think your partner is no more good enough for you, in some cases you are contented with what you have. If you really want to be in a relationship or marriage you have to be ready for it, its for the mature minds. Thanks for the post @ehiboss
Contentment is what most people lack, how can someone who loves you so much not be good enough for you. I just wonder how people think
Yes you're right. Same way it is also how we make our partners feel about us or impression we suddenly left on them. So the onus lies on both.
I have cheated in the past; it feels so good to have cheated death :)
Well, in a relationship, I think it is better you walk away if it is not working.
Lol, sure, it's always good to cheat death
Death deserves to be cheated:)
Ive always veiwed relationships like dat, it's an investment, u invest in ur partner until u build up something beautiful and solid. Already following, pls follow back...
Cheating is a very bad act,may God give us the power to overcome the temptation thanks for sharing this post.
Hello @ehiboss
Cheating is a terrible trend and should be eschewed at all cost but we shouldn't conclude quickly on the reasons why people cheat.
A TED video I saw recently revealed that from a detailed research, most men disclosed that they cheated because they were looking for a part of themselves in the person that cheated with, cheating made them feel alive.
Cheating should be considered a disease to be cured and not a curse to be abhored.
Great job!
Thanks for the reply
There is also no comfort in cheating
You did a good job here
Cheating is always an option - a bad one.
A very bad one.
@ehiboss my friend, please is not an obtion for creation of a good relationship. Because at the beginning all will look like you are doing it well or you are saving your heart, but at a long run, all will look like you are putting more kerosine on fire... Better we respect our selves for good health. Thanks for sharing dear. I love your cartoon. Please can I get mine too?
Cheating causes only disaster like you've rightly said
ahh, the age old debate. There are more things that drives a cheating individual, not to mention the fact that a person can technically love two people at a time.
cheating is wrong, but to some it is adveturous, the trill to do and not be caught, for others, its an escape, an escape from a broken relationship.
Despite what the world may think, a relationship revolves heavily around issues, and quarrels and annoyances that seem to pop up.
It will get to a situation where one is tempted to cheat, heavily so.
Oh, lest I forget, lies do not break relationships, the truth does.
Lol, good point
I love the fact that you didn't make your post gender specific.
That last line cracked me up a lil. :) Greetings :)The truth is she can never love the four. She will obviously be a player. And you know what? You can't play a player. Lol
Cheating has once destroyed my loving relationship. Since then I have not seen a partner like her. Cheating doesn't pay good. Instead, you endanger your health. Making it an option is like growing in madness. Thanks for sharing the boss
@ehiboss theres no justification for cheating at alllllllllllllll.
Do check out my post: https://steemit.com/dtube/@mybravewealth/wnkeegjt
Men who cheat are weaklings. They are too weak to grow solid relationships so they find it easier to drift around.
A person cannot love two people at a time but the quest for lustful satisfaction is the basis for cheating. He or she will love one better than the other so the latter is no more love but infatuation.
This quest is driven by several psychological reasons that tend to be either attitudinal or a result of trauma as everyone has a reason or cause for doing something.
Whichever way it is, is immoral. Though there are exceptions to most rules but for cheating, it is damn complicated.
Most people cannot be content, that's one of the reasons. How can someone not be happy with a person he loves is beyond my understanding