A chilling story.
I hate how doctors sometimes have an all inclusive term that they just throw out when something's wrong. Like panic attack. My brother had an almost fatal spine problem that our doctor never noticed, she always said he needs to work out, because his posture is a little wrong...
I'm really sorry for your loss, you shouldn't blame yourself for acting the way you did, your circumstances were really bad and it's very understandable that you didn't share your husbands enthusiasm. Think about all the good times you had together and how many times you made him happy.
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