Everybody loves IKEA, well not me - I cannot stand the place. You may enter only to buy a lamp, but you leave with a complete new inventory for the whole house as you exit, IKEA is a maze to get lost in, and time-consuming as no other furniture store.
The first time I went to IKEA was a three hour drive from my house. I was only going to have a look around, because everyone said that IKEA was so awesome, and I too wanted to feel this awesome experience that everyone else was so hyped up about.
So I park my car on the big parking-lot, and I enter into what I think is going to be something like a one, maybe two hour shopping experience - FACEPALM - I´m telling you - IKEA is not designed by normal people, it must be designed by the people who build inventory for LAB-RATS, because that is exactly how I felt in there - like a LAB-RAT!
So I´m walking there, looking at lamps - I find one and then I want to go to the cash-register and pay for it and get home, but where is the exit?
The whole place is designed to take you from room to room like it is a freaking movie-set with different installations and scenes created for soap-operas. I noticed a nice carpet, so I picked up one of those as well.
By the time I had made it half way through IKEA, I was dragging around two shopping-carts - then I noticed another lamp that I liked more then the first one, so I grabbed the new one and went back to place the first one where I had found it - but guess what - that is when the problem starts.
I swear - they have designed that place to make it impossible to go back and change things, instead you are sent around in a different direction in the maze that is IKEA only to end up where you are and missing where you supposed to go.
So finally I gave up, and just placed the first lamp in some IKEA-shelf full of rubber-ducks and went for the exit - following the blue arrows which in this case does not lead to the exit at all, but rather to the IKEA Restaurant which is placed in the middle of the entire complex - I was trapped!!
So I sat down at a table and figured I could use a bite to eat. After all, I had spent over FIVE HOURS in this torture-chamber, so I had developed an appetite. I went and ordered Swedish Meatballs - they where good, and made me happy as the blood-sugar and whatever other happy-drugs they had put into those Meatballs - I SWEAR - THEY DRUGGED ME, because as I left for the exit again - I was so happy, that I bought a Sofa, a Bed and a freaking Book-Shelf.
Finally after SEVEN HOURS I made it to the checkout ... OMG - FINALLY - THE CHECKOUT!!
I take out my stack of cards to pay for this mountain of IKEA-goods, and that is when they inform me that the Bank-Terminal system is down, so at the moment - they cannot accept cards, only Cash - which was a lot more Cash then I would ever carry around in Cash - so I had to head for an ATM-Machine out in the City they said.
It had already become night-time, it was dark outside and IKEA was about to close - I looked at the mountain of stuff I did not need, I looked at the time I had consumed - cursing myself for being so stupid to even go to IKEA in the first place, so I left for the ATM-Machine which they said was a minute away but changed my mind and turned the car around heading home.
I´m sure there are other places that can sell me a lamp.
@vato lmao - you just had to throw that in the mix, huh? :D
HotDog Championship, LOL
You are not alone mate, you are not alone.
Every single time I go to Ikea with my wife, I have to buy her flowers afterwards because we wind up arguing about pure deep seeded hatred that comes with buying a dresser. The swedish meatballs are okay.
It really says something that the best part of Ikea was eating chinese horse balls !
http://blogs.wsj.com/chinarealtime/2013/02/27/chinese-consumers-turned-off-by-horseless-ikea-meatballs/
OH yeah i can sympathise with you here - we have a hu-mungus IKEA here in Cairo and it is hell on earth over a weekend ( population of Cairo alone 96million!!!) and to me it seems they have all taken the literal to go to IKEA!!! - there is no way you can pop in to buy 1 item - my advise order on line and sit back with a cuppa and wait for it to arrive !!!
@ladypenelope1 - 96 Million just in Cairo - wow, Imagine when all the social media users there get on Steemit - it will be crowded!!
Yeah right! - they need to get their WIFI sorted first, hit and miss some days......
Sounds like a nightmare.
I've been to the Ikea near me (like 10 minutes away) a bunch of times. I've had the horror show experiences, like gathering up nearly $1k worth of stuff in the funky cart, tucking the cart out of the walk way for 2 minutes to look at their clearance stuff, then finding that an employee treated it as abandoned and returned everything.
Also, the place overloads your mind. You need to write down what you went in there to get. I've gone in there on several occasions to get one specific item I want and come out with 5 items I didn't and didn't realize I missed the one thing I made the trip for till I got home.
Once you learn the shortcuts those things don't happen as often.
I love their rechargeable batteries, they're basically Eneloops for like 1/5 the price. I also love the Ikea bags, all 3 types play a great roll, with 2 big ones you can carry all your groceries for the week comfortably in one trip, with the small ones you can actually stack stuff well, and the zip up ones are great storage, I put my winter clothes, etc. in them, write on it with a sharpie, and they're good to go almost anywhere till I need them.
I guess I just have some love along with my hate for IKEA.
Great story @alanc love/hate mixed IKEA relationship, I can see that being right. :D
I'm feeling happy now, since I never gave in to the hype to visit IKEA!
This article made me smile, quite humorous, good job!
@kenny-crane Thank you Kenny :D
I wish I had an IKEA near me to hate.
Lol...my husband would have agreed with you, he absolutely hates going to Ikea with me. But the last time he was there to buy a lamp for home, he literally went in and out within 8 minutes, record breaking, huh? The trick is to stay FOCUSED!!
@rea - Your husband is a hero, madam - a HERO I´m telling ya!
Take good care of him! :D
I dont like feeling like a LAB-RAT((
Go in from where the cashiers are. Haha
@btcbtcbtc20155 - I should have met you before in my life :D - why didn't i think of that? :D
I love IKEA maze. You can actual cut thru in the middle with a tiny door and get to the end quicker.
@cwmyao1 - there is a secret door? o_O Has it been there all the time??
is the Wizard of Oz door or the Alice in Wonderland Door!????
Yes there is, but they won't call it MAGNARP or SVIRVEL or TORSBO
They really know how to name their products. :)
Are these new Pokemons ?
This applies for women as well... The horrors of IKEA...
I wish I had an IKEA near me to hate.
I'm feeling your pain. But we can feed our kids those nasty hotdogs for really cheap.
They sell some great cookies though... Ikea should stop selling lamps and just sell their food fulltime - would make a better business.
I live in Japan.
IKEA in Japan is also the same.
It will buy anything other than what you really want by a maze.
In order not to be the case, I no longer go to the IKEA.
IKEA like hell for shopper :)