I started crying as Lady Sarah's words finally processed in my mind. I had never hated anyone so much in my entire life. I hated her, I hated that she had attacked me, and I hated that she was right.
"Miss Sarah... I..." I sobbed, unsure of what to say.
"Are you sure you're not a man, Miss Selena?" She sneered, stepping back and taking a good look at me. "Are you sure you're not in love with my brother? Did you share a kiss with him when he found you in your room?"
My lower lip trembled as I struggled to maintain my composure.
"I..." I finally forced myself to speak. "... I'm not a man, Lady Sarah. I never have been. Oh, I have kissed my fair share of men, but I have never been in love with one."
"You're not a man?" She asked, seeming sure that the men that she knew did not cuddle with each other like two little girls. "You're not a man?"
"No." I sobbed, exhausted. "I'm not a man."
"Perhaps it's because you're Beauty," She thought aloud. "Perhaps men will not want you if you're not beautiful."
I gasped. Did she think that I was ugly?!
"I'm the most beautiful girl I know!" I answered, shocked by her condemnation.
Her smug expression fell as she studied me again. She may not have been a blind person, but she certainly was not observant. She sighed, looking down at the floor, and took a few steps forward, standing next to me in the window.
"How... How can I be sure that you are not a man?" She asked me softly. "How can I prove that you are really Beauty?"
"Well... I don't know..." I sobbed, unsure what she was asking of me. "Maybe..."
"How can I be sure?" She interrupted me.
"H-how can you be sure?" I stuttered, creating a new series of tears.
"If you're Beauty, I will know."
"Know how?" I asked, confused.
"I can see whether you are beautiful or not."
I gasped, horrified that she thought that she could see beauty so easily.
"You... You can see beauty?" I asked.
She nodded, seemingly proud of herself.
"You see Beauty, Miss Sarah?" I asked, though I was beginning to understand.
"Yes." She answered, smiling.
"Why do you see it if it's not beautiful?" I asked, confused by her definition of beauty.
"Well... Beauty is when there is no blemish, Miss Selena. No scarlet running through the veins nor is there anything to impair the beauty."
"Yes, but what is the reason for it, Lady Sarah? Beauty isn't a wonder to all."
"It isn't?" Her expression dropped. "Why is it that such a common thing is the cause of such a great wonder?"
I felt that I had to answer her question, especially if I was Beauty.
"There is no certain reason for it," I told her honestly. "But, it's clear that it is something arbitrary. Some people seem beautiful and others do not, but in the end it's all the same."
She nodded and sighed, running her fingers through her flowing hair.
"Can you see anyone else, Lady Sarah?" I asked.
"No." She answered, looking me straight in the eyes. "My room is quite empty."
"Why is that?" I asked, curious.
"My siblings are Princesses. They do not need male attendants. They do not need a gardener, nor a painter, nor a coachman. They can have any servant or worker that they want, so they do not need my company. They do not need me to look after them, either. Prince Paul and Prince Theodore both have the best of everything that they need."
"So you don't have any friends, either. No one to talk to?" I asked.
"I've never had any friends, Miss Selena," She answered. "I did have a dream boy once..."
"Did you?" I regretted asking my next question. "Did you dream about Prince Paul before you met him?"
"No." Her face flushed. "I just dream about men. I'm not paid to dream about the Prince."
"Lady Sarah, I'm not here for Prince Paul. I'm here for you. I'm your friend," I responded kindly, hoping that I might be able to convince her.
"And why would you be my friend? Is it because of my beauty?"
"Of course not." I laughed. "It's because we have a lot in common. Our friends consider us close to each other, which means we have good lunches. It's a bit boring, but it's nice in a way. We can discuss our beauty and how to keep it better."
She chuckled.
"And also..." I smiled. "I will help you with your gardening. The Prince says that there are too many containers in your chambers."
"You want to help me with my gardening?" She gasped.
"Just to help you keep good health. You don't know how good getting fresh air and trying out some new things might be for you."
She smiled, looking me straight in the eyes.
"And you're helping me because...?" She asked, only daring to ask once more.
"Because you're my friend."
She smiled again and took me by the hand.
"Yes, that's very kind, Miss Selena. It's very kind of you. I will do as you suggest. You and I can share lunches together and you can tell me more of the princesses, I wanted to know them so much."
It was a feeling that I had never had before and that I never wanted to have. A feeling of closeness. It was a feeling that was a bit frightening, but I was having a good time. Despite my outward disappointment, I felt confident in my actions.
"Yes, that sounds like a good idea. I'll see if my uncle will kindly allow us our lunches together," I responded.
The Princess didn't seem to mind the statement that she was the daughter of the Prince Regent, no matter how much I wished she would.
