It was in September 2016 when I left my hometown. The satiety of everydayness and the boredom out of routine were too much for me to endure.
Since 2011 I dreamt of wandering without direction and with no rush whatsoever, but certain college education, that high paying job, a girlfriend who didn´t share my traveling agenda, countless debts and one a bit of a coward Eric kept stopping me from taking that step into the so longed uncertain destiny.
However, in the blink of an eye my reality changes, all those factors that were stopping me, they all vanished at pretty much the same time, and the strength of the thought I don´t have anything pulling me back, I don´t need to stay put in my city was too much for me to ignore.
It was Now or Never.
I went for Now>. From that moment on, all of my days are now. I don´t worry about the future and I don´t allow the past to follow me around - oh well, at least I try, but I don´t succeed all the time -, but this post is not about the way I live while traveling, what I want to express this time is very different.
This post is about the struggle and at the same time easiness of not belonging anywhere and yet, belong everywhere.
When I started to long term travel, I didn´t understand the seriousness of emotional closeness, I didn´t know how essential is that sense of belonging that we as humans need. We are social animals, the need of being part of a group is engraved on our species DNA and no matter how hard someone tries todeny it, the happiness we get when feeling accepted, loved and considered is one of the most powerful motors in life.
There are men who always play domino with their pals on thursday; some dudes go play football every saturday with the bros; some others attend the same bar every friday to meet the gang; we have those who practice their favorite hobby with the pals every wednesday... anyway, I could go on but I think you get the point. A few years ago I read about the psychological effect this has on a man´s psyche: being part of a group of friends where you can share and unload some burdens between men is one of the most important things in life, it actually helps us to cope and to be happier, it allows us to not loose our minds.
In my case, being constantly on the run and moving from town to town, from city to city - I think I´ve probably been to more than 100 towns/cities in the past year -, to meet so many people with which you connect on a different level, to experience so many new emotions, unknown sensations but mostly, to get to know yourself a bit more every day, has me 100% convinced that I made the right choice to take that step forward into adventure.
If you´ve been reading my blog, you know it is not about traveling, it is about adventure, no matter the where. Constant adventure fulfills me, but that doesn´t mean it is easy to have a lifestyle like that.
It´s not easy because, when you decide to change hometowns every 3-5 days, you end up not belonging anywhere and not being part of any social group.
That constant movement denies you the possibility of rooting, it doesn´t allow you to have friends who knows you better than yourself, you can´t speak about your daily problems/achievements with anyone and your conversations with strangers are very limited - a few days ago I had a very nice and intense conversation that went from 8 pm to 4 am... Do you want to know how long has it been since I had one of those?
Puting down roots, to make friends, have DMC´s (Deep meaningful conversations)... I don´t do that while I travel, in fact I avoid it at all cost, because after traveling for a while, you realize that to do all those things is to suffer and put your heart in pain. So I avoid it - but I can´t always succeed -, being a nomad does not get along with feeling like you belong, they just don´t, they are enemies like Ukraine and Russia.
When I started to travel I didn´t know this would happen. You should´ve seen how many times I suffered when leaving a magical town, a new friend, a short but intense love, a place where I felt like home at least for a few minutes... anyway, to have to pull the roots hurts - even if the roots are small -, but with time you learn to enjoy now and to get the most out of it, without thinking about anything else.
To be clear, to be emotionally unatached* doesn´t mean to not enjoy life at its fullest, to trust in people, to care about others, it just means that the here and now is more important than everything else. To focus in experiencing without that fear of loss, whether it may be a place, a friend, a feeling, a girl, a sensation or whatever, to focus on this, is the key for not feeling nostalgia while your trip goes on.
*not to be confused with detached. Detached means you don´t really cope with sentiments, unatached is that you choose to not get involved with them, but you DO feel them,
This doesn´t mean I don´t engage, it just means I engage so much everywhere I go and focus on here and now, that I don´t have time to miss the past. On the other hand, I´ve found in myself the best sidekick, the best person to have a conversation with, the best lover - no, I don´t mean touching myself, you dirty minded steemian -, I mean, when you learn to love yourself, to accept yourself as you are, to continue to know yourself everyday, to be able to be with only your thoughts for hours at a time, having conversations with your alter-ego, is when the here and now starts. I´m not saying I don´t need friend, love or feeling like I belong... every time iI have the chance and I can afford to suffer, I will dig in my roots, even when I know it will hurt, I just don´t do it as often as before.
Achieving this... well, I haven´t achieved anything who am I kidding, this is not something you achieve, you just move forward, you never stop learning and growing in the path of life, but what I´ve learnt so far, taught me how to leave a small piece of me behind in every place I go, every conversation I have, every kiss I give, on every place I felt happy in, in those moments where I felt something new. At the same time, I take a piece of them with me, I carry it with me very close to my heart and when I remember it, a smile is drawn in my face.
That way, it is amazing not belonging anywhere and at the same time, being part of everywhere... not missing of feeling nostalgia, because if I do that, then it becomes there and yesterday... if I find myself thinking of the past, all I have to say to me is...
I don’t travel as much as you do, and i am sure you are right about all these consecuences of traveling for that long.
But, i came to realize when traveling... that when you do so, you find a part of yourself that usually isn’t there when in the routine. When in the routine you already have all these friends and connections and things to do, you settle and stop connecting with others.
So, when you walk down the street ( the one you’ve walked a million times ) you don’t look around to see who’s there . When in a bar with your friends, you are having so much fun with them already, you probably won’t care about all the other people who’s there and you would probably like too, but you don’t need more friends so you ignore them.
When traveling you are eager to experience new things and learn about a new culture, a new language. You open yourself up to every possibility and every person you find along the way. That is a magical feeling, because you are giving yourself the possibility to connect with others without judgement even. People you would’ve never given the chance to approach you when in the routine turned out to be fascinating and even though you’ve met them only for a couple hours/days/ weeks you connected with them in such a magical way, you feel you’ve known them all your life. And even after your trip is done you keep being friends with them from the distance and your connection was so strong you actually feel like they are a big part of you now.
My point with all this is... When doing so with people all over, i would assume you end up with a bunch of friends everywhere and feeling like your home is the whole world.
Or does the excitement of meeting new people and learning from them vanishes after a while of traveling so much?
hmmmm I can relate to a lot of what you type.... my impetus to travel initially was much like yours. It came from a deep feeling that i wanted to move and experience. I wanted to see and taste and Go and not be held back! I do remember some feelings too of being bored with my current circumstance. bored with the people, the place, etc...
and also...
I know it is helpful for the psyche- but how do they do that? Ini and I were having a conversation the other day about that sort of thing- the sameness, the comfort... and I was really struggling with it. How do people see the same people, the same places, do the same things, show up for that same game of cards "How are you doing my friend?" "Oh alright.." and so on and so on for their entire lives?! Ah I am not built that way and I do not understand it.
I started my rooting process on my homestead because of many of the downside of the travel lifestyle aspects that you bring up. for me, there was this feeling like i was getting tired of the newness. it's two sides of the same coin, i think. now i have been rooting for 2 years and I can feel myself thinking... mmmmm it would be nice to be anonymous again, to travel at a moment's notice, be completely in the Here and Now with New sights and experiences and people, etc...
It is harder for me to stay in one place, that is for sure, but only in two years and I have some closer friends than I've ever had. I think it is good for my personality to develop these types of friendships and even go through the cycles of boredom!
Each person has their own story and their own way to balance these feelings of rooting and moving, connecting for long term and these bombastic short encounters that they'll never forget. isn't that amazing how time works that way- you can know someone for 20 years and perhaps someone you just met half an hour ago has impacted you just as much. Wow..... thanks for sharing <3... I think it's ok to feel the boredom and the missing and the loneliness.. all of it, as
it's all a part of the rich rich journey <3
Nice post - I'm wondering whether I should do a 'nomadic stint' at some point soon.... before I settle down properly and do the whole homesteading thing (the two don't really go together... travel, and homesteading!).
I'm really in two minds TBH, as you say, there are pros and cons. I'm also trying to decide (if I go) whether I go global and just backpack, or maybe convert a van and just stick to Europe, or I'm also toying with the idea of a bike.... there's something very appealing about the latter, it seems like a nice compromise, and I've always fancied a rohloff.
There was a great line I heard about the trick to cycling around the world: 'no push, only pedal'. (As in 'not push the bike, but not 'push on the pedal' in the sense of 'trying to get somewhere'.) I guess this applies to any mode of transport while travelling.
I also think I need to learn to live unrooted before I put down 'permanent roots' and morph into my garden permaculture style in my 50s/60/70s/80s - until I eventually literally morph back into the earth!
Thanks for the honesty!
Well as Turkish people we posses the nomad culture in us but I'm having hard time to move my ass eventhough I want to live and travel , it was a full reading experience hopefully I can change mylifestyle something close to this in the close future after I fully become financially independent.
its always possible to do in doses, small steps forward. and if its really something you want, youll find the right amount for you. :) good luck to us all in this journey of life
This is one of my favourite blogs of yours.
No roots is the 'price' you pay for freedom - up to you to decide which you want more.
Great piece!
I really understand you when you speak of love to him and fellowship with him. It is a great happiness to be a self-sufficient person, when you are independent from the opinions of others, from their assessment and their society. This is a real inner freedom. Such people never experience boredom alone. I am also one of those people. And I've been going to this condition. But it's worth the job. I am my own best support and assistant. Excellent post.
I have always wondered about your handle here and this post gives me an insight on why you are a nomad soul.
There was a time that wanderlust bit me and I traveled. I backpacked for a bit and you do create bonds with people that you meet. Some have become life long friends. Some you remember fondly but doesn't necessarily want to get back to them.
I liked what you said about us humans needing to socialize and creadt DMC.
Very nice insight on yourself.
The more you ungrip from the "system" the more you ungrip from anxiety, pressure and all those negative feelings.
Mother earth is generous, as master @wwf says :D
it is amazing not belonging anywhere and at the same time, being part of everywhere - I can very much relate to. Although I still didn’t packed my bags, I am dreaming about it. I’m sure it takes a lot of courage to make such a decision... And to be present, like you said - Be here. Now. It is exactly what Eckhart Tolle is talking about in his bestseller The power of Now. It’s great to see people who are truly living that! Thank you. 🙏🏻Great post @anomadsoul, last couple of sentences-
@anomadsoul I sincerely wish that I could be like you.
To be able to travel to wherever I want, meet new people and make new friends.
I wish that I have the resources to carryout my heart desires however, I will keep working until such a time I'm able to earn enough money on #steemit to do so.
You the best my friend
interesting thoughts i did not think about. i just started to travel and plan to do it for a while so i probably got a glimpse into my future from you. it makes sense though that one wants to belong to a group. in addition it might give you certainty to know on who and what you can count on.
Me resulta realmente interesante tu estilo de vida, aunque tampoco debe ser tan facil... pero en definitiva creo que si te gusta lo que haces y como lo haces entonces no hay nada que cambiar, que nada te detenga ni cambie tus planes, la vida es maravillosa y es una sola y hay que disfrutarla al maximo. saludos y mucho exito..
thank your friend your story is very interesting
I had never imagined there was so much behind @anomadsoul . There's a story behind everyone's life and yours about not belonging anywhere and still being a part of everywhere is a great one.
I kinda love your own philosophy about life and it really working for you, its amazing!
its really rare to see guys like you who prioritize and stick to
Adventures can only make sense when you have enough money and good friends that will make it lively.....
Wow! what a writer!! very nice!
Muy bueno e interesante el post. Afortunado que tienes la facilidad y de no sentir ese apego o necesidad de estar en un sitio, aunque con el tiempo uno se debe hacer fuerte. Hace unos años tuve que distanciarme de mi casa por compromisos laborares, al principio suele ser difícil pero eso te ayuda a crecer. Me gustó el " Remember, be here now" .
Saludos
I am also very fond of adventure but the money stops all. very good post friends.
I love this idea of being in the now. And using travel to assert this now-ness--I wonder how your philosophy will change as you continue to travel (or 'adventure,' as you say)? Perhaps it won't. For me, I need a little adventure each day or week. And, yes, it brings me back to the now of my own being and life. Thanks for posting this!
En esa foto te pareces a The Rock, diviértete mucho amigo.
Wow....i like this traveling...i like this post...all the best...
I congratulate you, as I have already said before you are very brave, although many of us would like to be like you, we live in fear of change, I hope you continue with a life full of success and that you visit soon Venezuela, I wish you many adventures to live.
Living in the now is so important regardless your life style. I think is equally important to live in the present if you are in the same town every day surrounded by the same colleagues or friends or if you explore new places and meet new people.
I love your post and your perspective.
Amazing very nice post my friend @anomadsoul
Living in the moment! Love this...enjoyed reading your post and about your interesting journey!
One of my biggest problems is living in the now, which only happens in nature for me, so being present in the current moment doesn't happen nearly as often as I think it would be healthy for my mind.
The problems you are facing while traveling are really interesting because I feel at some point in my life I will have enough of being tied to the stress of everyday urban life, and I will have to start the search to find inner peace and to know myself better. I am my biggest critic, so learning to accept myself will be also be a part of the process.
I hope you will do more insightful articles like this one. Cheers :)
My friend, so many lessons to learn from this post. I admire your desire to break the cycle of normality and embrace adventure. Being unattached also mean you are careful about who you let into your space and that is perfectly fine because you need to guard your heart because you are all you have. I have been waiting for you post a while now. The last one you posted was in spanish. How is it going there?
This is a very inspiring post @anomadsoul. It's interesting to listen to your story, and i'm glad that you made the jump to travelling in 2016. I would love to do the same for about two years, but unfortunately I am not in the position to do so at the moment.
I am very grateful for my current position, and I am planning to move to full time on Steemit as soon as possible, in order to grow the community and work from anywhere in the world.
I have recently started my Steemit Success Initiative, which I thank you for supporting! I am currently seeking some delegated Steem Power in order to make this initiative a large success, and when I do so, I will start working while travelling, and I can not wait.
Thanks again for sharing!
When is a new competition? we are excitedly waiting :)) @eric
I feel you, Eric.
When your friends at home ask you to hang out, but you are always on the run. It's indeed not easy, yet this kind of lifestyle is what I'm working for as well.
Never stop your adventure. Keep exploring like what you are doing now and freestyle it, nomad.
XD
Great post! It has been a pleasure to read your post.
I have travelled and lived in many different places. I feel I have left a little bit of myself everywhere and I miss those places and the people I met, so much!
The funny thing is that I now live in the little village where I spent most of my youth and I clearly feel I do not belong there.
I always face this challenge when I travel. I want to get away from people and have solitude and after about 5 weeks all I want is the familiarity of the people I know who know me well. It is a strange juxtaposition. I have learned that I need to move evenly between the two.
Eric, I love this piece as it comes straight from your inner thoughts. So often the glamour of showing off the great pics of the new place you are visiting shows the rest of us a life we wish we had. The perfect life where you travel all the time and see the world - who wouldn't want that as they go off to work each day at the crack of dawn?
But you have spilled out the downsides of it. But I love that you take it in stride and not only take a bit of the place with you, but leave something of yourself there too. What a wonderful way to think of it all.
I've never been a nomad like yourself, but I do often move every few years. Since becoming an adult I have moved away 5 times, so about every 4 years on average. I do enjoy this way of life. I see different places, but I also live there and really get to know how it is.
But I am always thinking of the nomads of the world.
(I dumped a collection of Steemfest photos in my latest post, and you are in a few.)
Many human beings @anomadsoul have codified in their DNA, that fear of losing comfort, the tranquility of what they think gives them "Happiness", a Happiness that many times is pseudo that does not take you to anything, that keeps you empty. It is really BRAVE to take that first step towards Freedom, I congratulate you, I like to see that there are wonderful people like you who dare to so many things and above all to LIVE ...
Congratulations for your life adventure;)
Definitely you have decided to live a life of brave, that tasty life you live @anomadsoul ...
A big hug and a warm friend ...
(^_^) @anomadsoul ... Wow! the beauty, rawness, and depth is truly breathtaking. Your boldness in learning how to drop anchor within yourself, and following your true north is inspiring to me. Here and now is all there is. What is yesterday? but a series of moments that coalesce and crystallize and labeled as "past" by our mind. Being openly present in the moment, that is LIVING. Thank you for sharing your adventurous spirit.
What part of the world are you in now?
It seems easy when I go through your blog @anomadsoul, only you know how hard it has been and I admire you a lot.
¡Al fin! un verdadero post de viajero. Un escrito honesto y visceral, ese que alimenta literatura.
De verdad que agradezco. Sé que se lee egoísta, pero es un post refrescante, que te hace ponerte en los pies del nómada por elección contemporáneo. Un poco Kerouak, pero no importa.
No que no aprecie los viajes, sino que este post ya les da un balance más humano.
Y supongo ahí radica mucho, en el balance, o la falta de éste
¿o crees que esos que se quedan de ver martes con martes no piensan en despegarse aunque sea un poco o no se molestan con sus amigos por ser tan cercanos y hacerles ver esa parte de ellos mismos que no quieren?
Uno siempre cree que el pasto del vecino es más verde (and If it is, i t's because it's fertilized with bullshit. )
Por eso me gustó tu post, pues yo bien puedo ser una de esas de los viernes que espera a sus amigos, o la del martes de promo en algún lado, te puedo platicar también de la extrañeza, la nostalgia, el hartazgo, y a veces creo que la vida del otro es fantástica.
Incluso en mis viajes esporádicos soy algo predecible.
Podemos platicar, de nómada a sedentario supongo JAJAJAJAJA
¡Saludos!
My father Always Says To me Iff you wants To Know The World Deeply Then You Should Leave The House And Go for a Long Journey...i Also TRAVEl to much there i met With bad people as well as Also good people....Experience comes through a time....it is Reality imotions Always Attached with Good peolple who feel good for you and care about you....great point about self eggo..we should finish our self eggo and When we will Come to know about inside of our body then everything will be perfeact...i Think we can Kill our self-Ego by We should be kneel when We met with Our little,s one...by doing this our self-ego and pride will be finished.....great experience got from your post.thank you for sharing dear.
Hey @anomadsoul! Deep and thoughtful post. We were wondering if you ever feel like a lost soul or the opposite? Are you constantly searching for something? Or maybe not searching at all, just experiencing what each day brings you. Somehow, your post reminded us of the movie 'Eat, Pray, Love'. Totally different circumstances and scenarios, but just the way you put it down with the adventure, lifestyle and finding meaning. Maybe it's the bit when you decided to live in the NOW.
Thank you for your wisdom. I will try to learn how to live here and now.
This is very good. But as much as we want to satisfy our free spirit's constant yearning for adventure, it will always be a good idea to tag your constant person along. Have a safe travel ahead!
i feel so much of what you detail out so eloquently in this post. im also a nomad, although i tend to bounce back and forth between living completely nomadic / working remote and then going back home for a year to test the waters. and i always end up back on the road. i have this innate yearning for constant growing and fulfillment - kind of like the adventure you reference. i think living in the Now is so important - and i am constantly chasing this dream.
thanks for sharing - i think theres something so powerful about connecting in these online communities with people from all over the world. especially when they lead to real, lasting relationships - whether purely digital or ending up meeting in the physical world :) and i love that both worlds exist!
The taste of 'achievement' in workplace and the every day reality really drifts you away from the nomadic freedom, appreciations for moments, people and nature. Yes, I have been just sucked in New York for a while but this year, it's time to make some moves. It's now or never -
I've learned so many lessons from your post. Very inspiring and interesting. Glad you encountered all you've been through and started to learn to enjoy the now life of yours. Excellent post!
Always seize the moment! You are so brave! congrats on living the dream @anomadsoul!