There is a serious lack of genuine empathy in the world, how everybody treats themselves and each other is a clear representation of this fact. Even when I was a child going thru complicated situations, I did not see it at the level I see it now. Maybe I was naive? maybe I walk a different path now and have woken up to the world around me? who knows. I did grow up in a small community parish ( not that religion is flawless or accurate by any means) but helping each other was a must and having empathy for others was also highly promoted. I survived and hung on to life because of the people around my community opening their hearts, much of the time they were those who were being ridiculed in their lives for being different and believing in different things than others so maybe they understood what I was going thru.
As far as the flag opinion, I personally don't agree it's violence all the time, to some it is deserved but we all have different ways of seeing the world and disagreeing with someone's opinion doesn't in anyway justify abusive comments the way he did. Perhaps the internet as great of a tool as it can be, also has it's flaws has brought together groups of people that otherwise wouldn't have connected in the past but also disconnected human beings from other human beings and the art of peaceful communication and making abusive comments has now become easier behind a screen where 20 years ago it would have had to be said to a real person to their face and face direct consequences for taking abusive behaviors.
Much like you, for a time I did engage in what I would consider abusive behavior to make myself feel better because misery loves company, also I have to admit I didn't have any love for myself either but thru my path to being a better version of myself, I have learned that every other living being (humans animals, plants) are an extension of myself, we are all interdependent on each other one way or an other. The way people treat others have is direct reflection of how they treat themselves on the inside as well. With that being said, if more people could learn to love themselves( by that I don't mean in a narcissistic way) regardless of their flaws or mistakes of the past and learn to forgive themselves and make the wrongs right again. As much as we get criticized for our views or "extreme path" keep spreading the love and the light,, one person at a time we will get the message of love across... In the end, the light wins over the darkness and the sun always rises again despite the dark of the night.
Please forgive the delay in responding to you. I was moved by the comments made to this post and I needed a few days to process. I feel balanced now to respond.
I thank you for your touching and intimate post. I can relate to what you shared as I was very naive when I was younger and really struggled with relationships even through high school and collage. In fact, it was not until my crises was resolved when I was 33 before I starting to turn my life around. Like you, that is when I really started to 'see' the lack of empathy in many people around me. There were lots of people who did have empathy, but it was also limited.
I respect your opinion about the flag war, but I must admit that I have a hard time accepting that people 'deserve' it. I don't think anybody deserves to be treated in violent or abusive ways. We can engage in touch love without resorting to those kinds of behaviours. But I agree that the computer screen has separated us deeply and removed the more intimate connections that we usually make with people.
I am grateful that you have found a way to change your abusive ways to explore more healthy relationships in your life. It is touching and encouraging to meet other people who have made the transition and extended it to all life, not just us. I share your views and I am grateful that you found the time and courage to share them here. I am honoured and privileged to witness this. Thank you.