I am in your fellowship as I have just experienced my first accusation of ostracism as a result of keeping a boundary. I feel honored.
Why do abusive people see boundaries as rejection? Because they were taught that "love" is to have no boundaries?
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I'm saddened to hear that it has happened to you. I pray that you can see past the covert violence associated with the accusation. To answer your question, yes, I think people do see boundaries as rejection. But it is more than that. Bullies don't like people challenging them as it shows strength. Bullies go after the weak and when people establish boundaries they are no longer weak. So bullies will attack the boundaries, sometimes at all cost, in order to re-establish the status quo. But when people stand their ground, they will move on. It is a tough process but well worth it. Welcome to what real love looks like my friend. Bravo for standing your ground.